Hi Guys,

My (28M) girlfriend (32F) really wanted to slow our relationship of 4 months down because she thinks we’ve gone too fast, resulting in her feeling overwhelmed and pressured. Therefore she’s asked for space.

I’ve booked to go away for the weekend, question is, should I invite her?

We’ve been texting less and I’ve been giving her space for nearly 2 weeks now, in that time we haven’t seen each other. Would inviting her add to that pressure she’s been feeling? Or would not inviting her cause an unholy shit storm? I want her to feel included that’s all but at the same time I don’t want her to feel pressured and not have her space.

Thanks!

6 comments

  1. A weekend get away 4 months in is pretty soon. I’d check in about her needing space but I wouldn’t bring up a weekend get away.

  2. Oh no. Noooo no no. This is the opposite of slowing down. If you really want to keep her, show her you respect her (and yourself) by giving her space and letting her dictate the flow for a while. She’s 32 – old enough to know how to tell you when she wants more from you. Sit back, absence makes the heart grown fonder. Take your trip for one and enjoy it my brother!

  3. Do you go alone or with friends/family?

    If alone, invite her. If she says no or so, i think her “pressure” problem comes from somewhere else.

    If not alone, i wouldn’t. Most likely it would be to much for her, regardless of her answer.

  4. I wouldn’t but it could backfire. Maybe let her know you are going, and Guage her reaction

  5. Man wanting space means she is not sure that you are the one or she is talking/seeing someone else. So first step, keep your feet on the ground. Since she is asking for space respect that and give it to her. If you love her, make sure she knows that you are around if she is ready.

    Well just don’t create this fantasy in your mind that she is the chosen one. Respect her choice but also don’t chain yourself to her.

  6. I would say invite her, but make it clear that she doesn’t have to say yes. She also doesn’t have to give you the reason, because she might feel bad if she doesn’t want to go but that’s her only reason for saying no

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