I should preface this by saying that I (M21) love my girlfriend to death. We’ve been together for a year and barring occasional arguments it’s been brilliant, and I strongly believe she’s my person. Recently, we’ve been arguing more, largely because of problems she has with my behaviour, like poor communication or forgetting things she tells me (I’ve recognised I’m guilty of these things). It’s become a bit of a rut that I feel we have to get out of sooner rather than later for the sake of our relationship. I’m desperate to deserve her but my progress with these issues seems to be slow and I feel she’s losing patience with me, feeling that I’m not trying to improve, and that my promises to are empty words. How do I become better, and how can I make quick progress into being the person she deserves and show her just how much she means to me?
TLDR: My girlfriend deserves more but I’m struggling to provide it
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Acts of service are generally an effective way to show someone you appreciate them. Hang up her coat if you notice it’s draped over a chair. Empty the bathroom trashcan before it’s too full. Suggest the restaurant she really likes but you aren’t a fan of (it’s one meal).
When she tells you about upcoming plans, schedule it on your phone calendar & have it remind you a day or two in advance. “Are we still doing dinner with so and so on Friday?” You look like a superstar because you remembered without her reminder!
Before any potentially anxious social gatherings, ask “are there any half truths you told these people that you want me to corroborate?” You always have her back. You’re on her side.
Good luck.