So I’m 17[F] and he guy I like is 18[M]. We’re in the same year and I’ve been friends with him for a while but it’s complicated. We know eachother because he randomly deicided to text me about the programme I use for digital art about last year.That’s when it all started. He’s funny , he draws and he’s Wierd ( the best part).He has a relatively small twitch audience and he enjoys making videos. But we never speak to eachother in school because our friends don’t overlap and I don’t want to make people think he’s wierd for being friends with me. Also I’m scared to speak to him In person.
About last week his close friend texts me drunk and asks me if I fancy the guy. He lives in a different city across the country. Apparently he was visiting and they were drinking.
I tell the guy I like about this and he jokingly tells me how to reply after I ask for a suggestion. He spoke with me till about 2am. At some point he says ” If your interested in me we can go out again, because y’know, we both are interested in eachother”. But I took this as a joke because he couldn’t have been serious. He disappeared for 16 minutes saying he fell asleep. We talked a bit more about his friend and say out goodnight. I told him to tell me I’d they’re OK the next moving because I was worried. And he remembered and told me.
We spoke rhe next day and I kept apologising and he say he didn’t know what I did. I told him about how I feel like I’ve worked him and I want to tell him what I did wrong. He
So I had a Halloween party about 2 days later. I get so rat assed drunk (which is difficult for me because I have a pretty good tolerance). I send him about 25 voice notes and keep saying how he’s pretty and cool and how horrible I am for ruining our relationship because I value him as a friend. He responds to some of them.
I delete absolutely everything when I wake up and he tells me “Hey man I get a notification every time you delete one of those so do it less frequently”. He asks me about the party and I accidentally called his moms name a hooker name.
So WHAT DO I DO? Should I try talking in person?
I’ve not spoken to him after his halloween stream on Monday.
Does being interesting mean the same as liking? Im not sure how I can fix this.
We’re both socially awkward people and this whole experinace is a mess.