im going to try to keep this short so im sorry if it gets long.
Basically I (f,21) had a friend (f,21) from high school and just after the first covid lockdown, 2020, she randomly stopped talking to our whole friend group (4 of us including her).
She’s actually done this before a couple of times since high school where she would only speak to other people but not us, the main 3. This would go on for some weeks in highschool and months in college and then she would come back when she needed something from us that her other friends weren’t giving her and carry on like she didn’t just leave us for other people for a prolonged period of time.
We havent spoken since 2020.
The last time we texted we had asked her on the gc if everything was okay and if she was alright and she left us on read for a couple days before replying that she was overwhelmed and she’d started a different phase in her life and we were all too young for her to relate to anymore (context if relevant, she’s the first one in our friend group who got a bf and was spending all her time with him). We all thought this was rude and we weren’t realising who this new person speaking to us was anymore (I am missing out some other problematic things she did just bcs this is soo long already).
I messaged her privately basically saying I wouldn’t mind being an acquaintance but I don’t think we could be best friends bcs her behaviour and her attitude was getting too much for me so I would be there for her to talk to if she needed but I didn’t want to go out of my way to meet up with her and spend lots of time with her (I still feel so bad thinking that bcs she was literally my best friend but it felt like such a heartbreak everytime she would go and disappear so I wanted to distance myself a little).
Anyway, to present moment now!
she dm’d me yesterday after 2 years of no contact saying she wants to meet and have a catch up. I don’t know if I want to invite her back into my life eventhough when it was good it was gooood we’d have so much fun together and I know I could rely on her with the heavy stuff and she could rely on me but after the last couple of years I don’t know if I can trust her anymore and obvs our relationship isn’t the same as it was I just feel like that bond has faded. but I keep reminiscing the good times and what could have been.
both of my best friends don’t want to meet up with her but I’m not sure bcs she hurt us and me so much with ghosting us and other stuff but another part of me is hoping everything can go back to how it used to, eventhough I know deep down it properly never will. like I know if we meet up it’s just going to be so awkward, what would I say to her.
so how should i go about this situation? how do i message her back ? I see this going one of two ways I can let her back into my life and wait for her to ghost me again for who knows how long the next time or i can tell her no, which I wouldn’t know how to do bcs i find it really hard to do in general.
So how do I go about replying to her??
tldr: best friend goes no contact all the time, she finally replied after 2 years, how do I reply to her?