Like is sex now just a customary date activity that happens fairly often??
I’ve been on a couple dates with women, some better than others. On the dates that I thought otherwise webt well, we vibed, laughed, had fun, I had never gotten a second one. And I’m starting to wonder is it because “I’m moving too slow”
On all my dates, I’ve never actually kissed the girl or ever had sex with them. I totally wanted to do these things with some of the girls I dated, I was just hesitant as I didn’t know if going for it would just push them away since they were looking for a date and not a hookup.
I don’t even know how this works, like do I have to bring the topic of sex up? “Do you wanna go back to your place?” Or is it more just something that’s implied and I should just wait till she talks about sex or gives me strong hints?
Cause I felt some of my past dates went well, and I did want to spend more time and go on more dates with them, but I didn’t get the opportunity and while I thought the dates were enjoyable, I never felt the “lean in and kiss me” vibes or, the “take me back to your place” vibe. And I’m starting to wonder is that on me to initiate and I never brought it up? Even if I don’t exactly feel any sexual vibe yet.
Or will I just “know” and “feel” it? Or just wait for her to mention sex causally in conversation that that is the clue I’m waiting for. I just don’t want to make her uncomfortable or ruin the date for her
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Lol if you meet in dating app 90% other than that know who you talking to. I personally don’t want to have sex to random girls.
Really just depends on the chemistry, and vine between you two. I’m someone who let’s their intentions know, at least, after the date by giving them a kiss. Sometimes it leads to more on the first date, and sometimes it doesn’t. If not, then most likely the 2nd/3rd date is when things will really get going.
Cart before the horse. You’ve never kissed any of your dates, but wondering if sex is customary on a first date?
I’m guessing it’s a lack of the physical that’s giving them friend vibes. That doesn’t mean sex or even kissing. Are you touching them at all?
If you aren’t getting second dates it’s not because you aren’t trying to bed them.
From what I’m inferring based on what you’ve said, and how you’ve said it.
You seem pretty low-confidence, low-assertiveness and/or low experience which seems to explain your problems in a nutshell.
As a rule of thumb, if you don’t do anything in anyway that makes it clear you want to be more than friends, then you’ll end up in the friend category, and it certainly sounds like you don’t make that clear.
Also, it’s possible that you’re not getting second dates due to nothing to do with this, and you’re just fucking them all up a different way.
For example, you could just be paralysingly in your own head the entire time, which would make the interaction seem really forced and just unpleasant to be in, hence they don’t want to go through it again
Casual touching is a brush of the arm or hand, leaning in , sitting close. Smile look at her read her eyes and body language. You will know if she’s into it.
I would say it’s rare. If it is common, it shouldn’t be. Take time to get the know the person and decide if you really want to build a life with that person.
It is common, but should not be expected.
Only once in my adult life has it taken a third date (or longer) for sex to happen.
It’s taken a second date a handful of times.
The majority of women I’ve slept with, have been on the first “date”.
You will have to create the sexual vibe most of the time. You will need to hint at going back to your place. You will have to start the touching, being close, leaning in for the kiss. Women just give you very very subtle signs that they will be open for that. Mainly by not responding negatively or drawing back while you attempt something.
Women hate rejection even more than men do and they are not going to risk it by either doing something or being to open about what they want, in case you reject them on that. They want to see you desire them so much that you are willing to risk it.
Male sexuality is focused on the women. Our jaws drop by just looking at them. We go nuts and are turned on when they wear sexy outfits. Women are turned on by how turned on we are by them. They want to be desired. It’s highly narcissistic in that regard. She wants to see how far you are going to go because you are so turned on by her. (ON AVERAGE! Before people come screaming “i am totally different”)
If a woman wants to have sex with you it will be pretty obvious, bordering on creepy. A woman wanting a kiss will get very close to you and get touchy, eye contact, look at your mouth a lot etc…
If you never got the vibe, you never got the vibe. You may have missed a couple of opportunities, but chances are good those women were not into you.