Casually met an old classmate and he invited me to a party. I am feeling a bit anxious.

I (27M) have been living in this small town for some three years. I don’t hang out with anyone here, mostly because I am insecure and avoidant.

This morning I casually run across an old classmate, exchanged a few words and he invited me to a party this Saturday. He didn’t even know I had been living here all this time, goes to show how little I go out.

I told him I would come and to message me on Facebook.

While this could be an opportunity to become part of a social group in my town, I am very anxious.

The biggest insecurity that I have…I don’t have a girlfriend, never had one, so what the hell do I have to show for? I am afraid that the subject will come up in conversations (and it certainly will) and I will feel ashamed. So what do I do, prepare lies in advance?

Also having to justify the fact that I haven’t gone out here all this time, that I don’t have friends…

I mean, what if someone decides to play a fucking game of truth and dare…I have zero sexual experience at all.

You might say I am overthinking but I believe this issue is downplayed because the vast majority of people have had sexual experiences and relationships by this age, so they can’t come up with ways to deal with feeling inadequate or feeling judged when you lack these experiences, because they never had the problem.

Also what if someone gets drunk and decides to pick on me. I can fight but why would I want to deal with that shit. Yeah I know we’re grown adults, I guess I have some trauma from the past.

I WILL go but I am feeling anxious.