I admit that I’m neurotic so sometimes when I’m anxious I will be the worst communicator.
I sent my “friend” (more acquaintances, really) a text saying that I’d like to talk about a time where he said some things that hurt me. I said that I don’t really know him and no one has ever acted that way towards me before so I’d like to talk to him about it for a few minutes. I said I won’t attack him or demand an apology or anything like that. I said that I just want to understand him and know if I did anything wrong to warrant that behavior.
Honestly, maybe it’s because I don’t trust him, but I did not expect a reply. He actually replied pretty fast but it took me until the next morning to check it and read it.
He actually apologized and tried explaining himself and said that he would never do that again, but for a couple of reasons, it wasn’t “good enough” for me and I still wanted a couple of things cleared up. But I don’t want to bug him or attack him. I don’t have a lot of experience actually talking to men so I don’t want to make it some back and forth over text.
I just saw him unexpectedly during a hangout and obviously he would kind of be around me from time to time to gauge if I’m ignoring him (I mostly was because I just didn’t want to look at him). I eventually made eye contact and we said hi.
If I were to reply tomorrow, would that be too late? Would I look insane or toxic? I didn’t do this on purpose; I genuinely took forever to check to see if he replied and I also could not come up with a proper response.
Tl;dr: sent acquaintance a text saying that I was hurt by his words on a particular night and I would want to talk about it for a few minutes soon. He replied and apologized. I saw him tonight and we only said “hi.” It’s been 2 days since he replied to me. If I were to text him back tomorrow would I look insane?
2 comments
Text him as soon as you can. Apologize to him for not getting back to him sooner and for being awkward when you saw him. You didn’t expect it.
Then thank him for taking your request for an apology seriously and thank him for the apology. He isn’t a close friend. You don’t have a strong relationship with him. Telling him his apology wasn’t “good enough” makes you look petty. You say you don’t trust him. So what would be the point of dragging this out further? You can be cordial when you see him and you’ve established that you will call him out when he treats you poorly. Take win you have. Anything more seems vindictive.
Honestly, at this point I think you’ve just to either drop it completely or send an olive branch if you want to maintain a friendship..
‘Hey Thanks for your reply, I’ve had time to think about it and I agree it was probably a big misunderstanding. Thanks for the apology, I also apologise if I misread the situation! let’s draw a line under the whole thing and start again x’