When I was younger, I was sort of religious and thought I should save myself for marriage. In college, I realize that I could pleasure myself as in masturbation. As I kept doing it, I felt more sexually horny. I started to think maybe I should just have sex with the first guy I want. However, I don’t feel comfortable doing that now I’m thinking should I wait? Should I wait for someone I truly love?
15 comments
Hello there! No, it is not weird at all, as waiting for a partner, who you truly love is both a fulfilling and lasting experience, because you would be emotionally closer to the person as well as comfortable being around them, as opposed to being with a perfect stranger who you know a little about and who is not dedicated to you. The key to your whole post is “ I don’t feel comfortable doing that now”, because when it comes to sex, being comfortable is key, and there is no race, it happens in the right time with the right person.
You’re 25, find someone who you like who likes you back and go have fun. Abstaining doesn’t keep sex special, sex is a skill, it gets more special the better you get at it. Is it better with someone you love, of course, but holding back on sex until sure that a connection is true love just leads to missing experiences.
It isn’t sex with someone you really love or a garbage ONS, there’s a world of difference in between. Relationship and sex experience are things one should be building through mid 20s. You only live once, putting off building sexual experiences till later at 25 is just not needed. A wizard is a person who makes it to 30 as a Virgin, making it to 25 and then putting it off for a quest for true love is how one gets there!
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nooo not at all i lost my virginity like a week ago to a ons/fwb (i’m 22f) and i was also brought up super religious so struggled a lot w the guilt!! the sex was nothing to write home about i don’t regret it at all personally but i can imagine waiting for the right person would mean a much better experience (it was super painful and i was spotting for almost a week bc i didn’t wanna assert boundaries w someone i barely knew and i didn’t tell him i was a virgin) but if you do it w someone you trust to take care of you even if they’re not necessarily “the one” you’d likely have a much better time ALL THAT TO SAY there’s no right or wrong way to lose your virginity as long as it’s on your own terms 🙂
Not weird at all, it’s more common than you think. But do you fantasise about it? Do you have sexual urges? Have sex if you want to have sex, virginity and it being a big deal is a social construct.
I only fear that you’re waiting and expecting it be super special – in reality you can’t consistently plan for good sex, there are so many variables to a good experience. I would suggest that you try and find a partner that is respectful of your boundaries, I wouldn’t say that this person has to be your prince charming (or princess) romantically speaking.
It’s not hear of anymore. But not weird.
Don’t wait for someone “you truly love”. That’s a bad condition to have on it.
Have sex when these conditions are met:
1. You’re attracted to the person and the person is attracted to you.
2. You trust the person enough to know he’s not going to force you to do things you don’t want to do.
3. You vetted the person to just verify he isn’t a stalker type or a douchebag (the type who just tries to get their body count up) type.
4. You’re comfortable with yourself enough to have sex.
5. There’s no hugely negative repercussions that can come of it. Just think of “what would happen if people found out we had sex OR it got awkward between us?” and if the “what would happen” could be something really bad then don’t do it. Like don’t sleep with coworkers above or below you in position. Don’t sleep with coworkers you work closely with. Don’t sleep with professors, don’t sleep with non-single people (unless they’re in an open relationship… you get the idea.
6. They’re willing to use protection.
If these conditions are met, feel free to have sex with them.
Sex honestly isn’t much diff from masturbation. What makes it great is the warmth and knowledge your not alone. So wait
I lost my virginity at 24. It’ll happen.
No. If it’s by choice, don’t worry about it.
1 in 5 after 25 I think.
Contact me when you reach 42
I wouldn’t say it’s weird. But only like 12% of people your age are virgins. If you want to have sex then do it cause you only live once. It’s just sex and I don’t see the point of wanting to wait for someone you love. you might later on regret that you waited so long
No, not weird. Do what feels right to you. I wouldnt have sex just to have sex though but to each their own. Some people need that emotional connection, others dont.
I waited until I met someone that made me feel comfortable, safe, and special. The right person won’t care how long they have to wait. Lost my virginity at 20, and a year later we’re still going strong