I got my first ever boyfriend at 16 and my father is very relaxed and not strict at all usually but when he found out I had this boyfriend (who was very respectable and my age) he absolutely flipped and said “you have a new man in your life now, you aren’t my daughter anymore”. I recently got a new boyfriend at 20 and this man is even better than the last with a very well paying job and traditional values yet once again my Father is seething. He said “I knew as soon as I saw him that he would be the one you marry” but with such anger and hatred in his voice as if he was accusing me of something horrible. It’s so bizarre, there is not a man on earth he would be happy with me dating. What is his problem and what can I do about it?
7 comments
Your dad has issues…
He sounds jealous of this guy stealing your attention and becoming the new man in your life whereas previously he saw himself as the only and most important man in your life.
He is having trouble letting go. He needs to come to terms that you are growing up.
Don’t try to find a guy to please your dad. Find a guy that’s right for you. Your dad can decide how he wants to fit into your life, not the other way around.
Sounds like some narcissistic tendencies at least. I know it’s hard but one day you have to make decisions which are in your favor and not the people who you love. It’s your life and you have to deal with the consequences of your decisions, so why let anyone decide the decisions you make?
It would probably be a good idea to put some distance between yourself and your dad.
Look your dad straight in the eye 👁 and say ,” Papa , I finally found the guy good enough for me ,” Have your boyfriend come in wearing clothes similar to your dad clothing , wearing a bald cap with hair on the sides and a bald spot in the middle , make sure to dye the hairs gray to match your dad . He will pleased . Thank me later.
Your dad sounds terrifying