Not trying to give a jab at anyone. Yes everyone is beautiful and all that, but brutally honest question here cause I’m really curious of other people’s opinions. If you like someone’s personality BUT they just don’t physically appeal to you at all, would you still date them seriously and do you believe that relationship would last?
Personally I think a relationship should be when both parties are both emotionally and physically attracted to each other. As in if they don’t find me attractive at all then there’s also no use in pursuing a romantic relationship and vice versa. But also a literal greek god with a trashy personality/ incompatible with mine isn’t gonna be any better because we’d lack proper communication and connection.
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No I use to date men I wasn’t attracted to because I had been told that only unattractive men treat you right. Until I had more dating experience and realized I can find a good guy I’m also attracted to and they also treat me better. So yeah I’m never going back
My longest lasting relationship was with somebody I didn’t find attractive, nearly ten years.
No, I wouldn’t date someone I didn’t find attractive.
Depends. If I loved a woman’s personality enough, there’s no doubt in my mind I would continue seeing her as long as I found her pretty/hot/etc (regardless of if she was my preference or not). Who knows? My preferences could expand, change then, all of a sudden, I end up really liking both personality and appearance.
If I don’t think, at the bare minimum, she’s pretty/hot/etc, I wouldn’t be able to date her at all regardless of personality.
Yes! Even if they may not be “my type”, if they have that special something, I’d go for it.
I don’t think we are specifically attracted to the looks, sure someone can have pretty eyes, nice shoulders, etc, but I think when we see someone, we are attracted their charisma, not so much they looks.
Nope. For me that would mean either lying to them and telling them I think they’re attractive, or them having that insecurity that I don’t think they’re physically attractive looming over the relationship, and I’m not willing to accept either of those realities.
Also, sex is best when there’s both physical and emotional attraction. If you’re missing either one of those it’s just not as good.
I can’t date someone I am not physically attracted to. That’s a friend, nothing more. If I don’t want to sleep with you, then I don’t want to date you.
My first crush and still my biggest regret was someone I didn’t find particularly attractive physically. Ok to be fair, She wasn’t unattractive but I definitely wasn’t smitten with her looks. But what she had was the best personality. She was so sweet and kind, fun to talk to, and very talented. She used to make her own dresses from scratch. How cool is that? And they were really pretty and often elaborate. She was one of the few people in high school that took time to talk to me. I kinda wish I told her how much I liked her, but tbh I wasn’t mature enough then to do anything about it or make a relationship work.
So yeah I would date someone who’s personality shines but is physically less attractive. As long as they aren’t repulsive or something. Now I have no idea if that relationship would actually work out or not.
I completely agree. I would never date someone I don’t find attractive. It’s not shallow, it’s just common sense.
In the past there have been guys who have liked me and I’ve had people tell me “You should date so and so…he likes you so much and he’s so nice.” It would always piss me off because I deserve to date someone I’m attracted to.
I’d rather be alone than date someone I’m not attracted to.
Yes, I would and I have. They weren’t conventionally attractive by any means and (not to be bragging, but) I got the “You are with HIM??” reaction relatively frequently. He had an amazing brain and a great sense of humour and that made him very attractive to me.
What wasn’t great was his cheating, but he had a good excuse (or so he thought) : Girls around him suddenly noticed he was an option due to being with me, so he basically just had to succumb to the female attention he’d started to receive.
Yes I Will do that
Depends. Are there other things about them that I like? How unattractive are we talking about? Sometimes I’ve gone out with people who weren’t necessarily my type but I felt more attracted to them because of how they were on the date (humor, personality).
at this point in life yes lmao, but what you mean exactly lol, going on a first date is okay to me, you are not going to have sex or be attached emotionally just from this first time, the point of a first date is just to get to know the other person, make the girl talk as much as you can.
Unfortunately no…I’ve tried to give a couple of guys a chance because they were really kind and into me, but ultimately I just couldn’t get past not being attracted to them…so now I wouldn’t even try as I know it won’t work and I don’t want to lead anyone on.
No.
Just be friends if that’s an option you both can agree with.
I would date even if I am not physically attracted cause how you look dose not matter it how you treat others and your self that matter 10 times more my only exception to that rule if they are visibly unhealthy and or don’t take care of them selfs
Depends on how funny and easy to talk to they are and if they are bedroom compatible
There has to be a bit of attraction. Otherwise it’s more like platonic friends. Maybe it’ll develop after a few dates when you know them better. But if t doesn’t then it’s not fair to either of you to keep dating
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Similarly you might be very attracted to someone and go on a few dates then realize that the attraction went down the dump
To an extent. I don’t have to find them attractive at all, but I also can’t date someone I find actively unattractive.
I’ll date someone in the “I don’t care about your looks at all and nothing is doing it for me” range
But I won’t date someone in the “wow this actually looks bad” range
Cause otherwise I’d be too distracted by what looks bad
Yep. I’m demisexual, I don’t find anyone attractive until I’ve known them for a bit and feel comfortable around them. There’s no set timeline, but usually 2-4 dates in I’ll start feeling attraction.
I’m dating someone right now who I’m not really physically attracted to but he’s super emotionally intelligent, treats me really well and overall has a great personality. So to me in this situation, physical looks are less important than personality because I find these not physical things really attractive
Possibly. I’m not really amorous anymore, so sexual drive doesn’t really play much of a part on choosing a partner. But on the other hand, I don’t want to sell myself short either.
Not finding someone attractive doesn’t mean they’re fugly, so I guess time is the deciding factor.
No, but, physical attraction can grow. I’ve definitely ended up dating and being attracted to guys that I didn’t find attractive right off the bat. Personality or other charisma can make someone start seeming more attractive than you originally thought. I tend to go for slender or athletic builds that are tan and not hairy at all…but currently totally into a guy with an “average” dad bod and hair on his chest. He’s talented, funny, smart, sweet, and has a handsome face, so I don’t even care about the body type. He’s very attractive to me now that I got to know him well.
I’ve had a few male acquaintances that turned into friends then something more. After getting to know them and seeing how they were as a person, I found their physical appearance just as attractive as their inner self…good sense of humor, kind and loving heart…that’s my main two.
No. I gave a lot of “nice boys” I wasn’t attracted to chances in school. I always felt smothered and they never ended well. Attraction is important to me, so I need to be attracted. That doesn’t mean I go only for western beauty standards, but I at least need to feel fanny flutters during the talking stage or I know it won’t last long before I feel caged in to a relationship I don’t want.
That being said, I’ve ended up being attracted to people after getting to know them and finding out they’re awesome.
i would – i typically fall for personality before looks anyways!
The thing is, your attraction is heavily influenced by how much you care for someone. So, while I wouldn’t date someone I found repulsive, but someone who is just ok looks wise may become much more attractive as you begin to care more for them.
Initial attraction means almost nothing. It’s fleeting and not based on who the person is.
I would (and have) BUT I need to find the person averages out to around my level in all aspects. If they match my intelligence, have a good sense of humor, are a good person, and have their stuff generally together (decent career, etc) then physical isn’t important. I think I would rather have a partner who is lacking in attractiveness than any other aspect that would make me want to date them.
By the way, I do find that if someone is attractive enough emotionally, the physical aspect comes. As with someone who is attractive physically but you aren’t on the same emotional level as. I found my ex hot at first, but the longer our relationship went on, the more ugly I found him and the less I wanted to be with him. 2 years in, I still want to jump my current boyfriend’s bones constantly and I find him just as hot as the day I met him.
I would date someone who wasn’t conventionally attractive or someone I didn’t initially have much attraction to if I liked their personality, sense of humor, or intellect enough. I’ve dated people I wasn’t totally attracted to in the past, and the attraction grew over time. That’s not for everyone though.
No. I used to think I could lower my standards if the guy was just good enough in other areas but I know I would just be setting myself up to consider cheating in the long run. I need intimacy and if I am gritting my teeth and faking it just to fill the need, I’m going to be unhappy and trapped in a sexless marriage. He doesn’t have to be gorgeous or super handsome or have model looks, he just needs to be cute TO ME in some way that when I look at him, I have to smile. Without that, I won’t be happy sleeping with him on the regular.