To preface this: I have asperger’s and socializing or making small talk is difficult for me, I don’t really do well with having non-exchanging conversations with people, especially those that I only know in a business context.
Question:
I have a big news blogging platform that I have been running for 3 years now, and it runs well, from time to time I go to conference events or get backstage media passes for things, meet some really well networked people – some in powerful positions that could potentially help me.
I do some chit chat, build small rapport and get their contact information in a superficial ‘we should connect’ manner, usually get their Linkedin or Telegram.
Then month could pass and I’m in a situation where I could use their help or seek advice from them, but it feels awkward if the initial followup after seeing them months ago is ‘Hey can you help me get in touch with XYZ?’
I have no interest in small talk, knowing how they are, or anything fake. These people are super busy anyways and (probably) wouldn’t entertain the small talk via text anyways, so I usually go straight to the point.
How do people do this the RIGHT way? How do they stay warm and friendly over distance and over extended periods of time with people they genuinely don’t care about and only have them around for a reason that benefits them ?
1 comment
Try to find out what your new contacts are interested in. See if you can help them. Write down somewhere what you learn and reach out in the context of helping them or sharing something you thought might benefit them.
This helps networking feel more genuine and less transactional. It can sometimes feel a little soulless if it’s only just what can you do for me.
That said, if you met someone who you think can help you, just reaching out and asking directly is usually fine.