A few days ago I’ve been at a bar (more like a club) by myself because I wanted to learn to talk to people but I found it really hard to do that is such a loud atmosphere so I didn’t actually talk to anyone (except one drunk guy with his buddy who talked to me, that was great). So in conclusion that was a bad idea.
Where can I learn to do that gradually? I’m not the type to learn that by exposing myself to the hardest possible way and fake it till I make it.
So basically I’m looking at places where you’re supposed to talk to people. I’m thinking about signing up to a cocktail mix course. Any other ideas more geared towards my suggestion?
2 comments
It’s really great that you’re putting yourself out there like that. For me personally, it was ideas like this class that you suggested — formal things that put people in close environments that have you talking. Along with classes, club meetings are great too or anything physical fitness like a group workout or meet up. If you’re into fitness rock climbing gyms are very easy places to meet people and talk — just sitting there and working on problems together.
Found myself in a similar position once, but as I got a job, I started to mingle with my colleagues and I suggested we perhaps get a drink after work, or go do something fun. Maybe a job would help? It’d be very commendable of you to get a job for reasons other than money nowadays anyway.
Other ideas;
Courses of any kind. Examples: language, movies, books.
Join a club. Examples: cooking, climbing, photography.
Volunteer. Example: homeless shelters, door to door sales, picking up trash
Join events. Example: comic con, dance events, fair
Other possibilities:
Talk to someone at the park. Talk to some of your neighbors, or some people of your age in the neighborhood. Go to a museum or go to a popular casual restaurant and just enjoy yourself, strike up a conversation when it feels good. Talk to some old friends/colleagues/schoolmates, perhaps ask to meet some place. Start an event yourself, like a get together for old classmates, even if you weren’t friends.
Try the bar again, except a different one where the music isn’t so loud. There are plenty out there. It’s trail and error. A bar is great because tipsy people are usually happy and more courageous, enough so to talk to random strangers.
Don’t be afraid to ask if they have social media or something so you can get in contact again if you do meet someone you want to get to know better.
Also, sometimes getting to know your family better (like cousins) can be great.