I never have had a relationship and Ive never kissed anyone and my life is pure shit. I wish I could find someone to hang out with. Im sort of not currently in school because my parents dragged me into a 40 acre plot and I cant really leave because I never got my permit and its rained a lot lately and is so muddy that it makes me anxious not being able to go hang out with of my friends and the closest hs to me is like ~6 miles away and I’m living in an RV with my stuff everywhere and I just got a phone and I can’t really get a job because if I did I wouldn’t be able to get to it on time and waking up is so hard. I wish I could hangout with my friends and get a gf and have sex and kissing… I don’t know, Ive never kissed anyone before but as I recall when I was ~ somewhere from 9 – 12 years old I may have had sex with my friend once, but its been so long I don’t remember.. He moved back to Russia a few years ago ~. And Although I remember giving bj’s sometimes.. And pretty much before I moved to my property I kind of had/have a wanking problem… :/ Because I have c-PTSD and dyslexia, Its hard for me to control myself and I feel un wanted.. My life has been trash most of the time and this year has been one of my worst years of my life, like it couldn’t get any worse.. I got assaulted at school the day before my only ever favorited school started. 6th of September 20222 and roughly 14:30~. I got bored out of my mind and was at the property home alone and nearly died driving a truck on my property( got it stuck but was able to get it out like 4hours later maybe)…. And my 8th grade year was so bad that I had such a bad mood regulation I kicked down a door at the school… It is basically not really a school cos its not private nor public and only has like 15 students tops. Ive also, not this last summer but the summer of 2021 or 2020?? I was put in a psychiatric hospital… And I dont know if kissing or sex can calm anxiety or blank minded(i guess similar to overwhelmed)? I just need some help on how I should start a relationship like that? :/
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Hi