My boyfriend is going home for Thanksgiving and I was thinking about sending him with a Christmas gift for his parents. I haven’t met them or even talked to them because they live in a different state. I want to acknowledge them in some way, so I’m not some stranger that lives with their son who they’ve only ever heard about.
If it wouldn’t be weird, what kind of gift should I get? Probably nothing personalized I’m sure, but what would say “hey thanks for creating this cool guy that I like! I’m a real physical being and I hope to meet you one of these days” ya know?
15 comments
Depends, how long have you both been dating?
Do his parents know about you?
Are you both serious?
Yes do it
Yeah I think it would be a nice gesture on your part! Maybe stick to something generic though. Nice soap and/or lotion for their bathroom for example
Edit: even if the gift itself is simple/generic you could include a nice card. Say something along the lines of “I really enjoy partner’s company and I can’t wait to get to know the whole family” or something like that
I think it’s a good idea. A luxury candle is always a good idea, a decent size from Diptyque or something depending on your budget. I got my bf’s parents a tea set last time bc I know they like tea but a candle is always a safe bet if you don’t know them.
I think it’s super sweet. I can’t seem how that will come off as anything other than them being happy for their son to have found a thoughtful partner. Go for it! Don’t worry too much about the gift, give them what you feel they will appreciate based on what you know of them.
Consideration is a nice gesture but ask your bf first. It’s not that you technically need his consent but given the distance of the relationship between you and the parents, if he hasn’t told them about you it could be awkward (and if he says he has, the question is whether they really understand him or whether they aren’t taking it seriously).
Likewise having a dialogue and conversation can help alleviate pressure off him feeling like he “has too” and whether something special is appropriate. I had a gf gift a fancy chef knife and didn’t ask me why I couldn’t gift it. She remained extremely pissed until I sat her down and went over why we don’t gift such things at certain occasions.
So have that conversation and see where it takes both of you. Don’t feel pressured or feel you need to act on this desire; it’s honestly natural wanting to do something nice for his parents for Christmas but redditors won’t know how deep and serious the relationship has blossomed so saying a gift is a good thing can be premature under certain circumstances.
Together for 7m and you already live together in your parents basement… he is going to thanksgiving to his state and you are not invited (?) and you want to send a gift to some people who you haven’t even spoken on the phone (?) and the only reason they know about you is because he moved into your house…
Am I the only one who sees red flags all over this? How old are you?
I think a better form of connection would be suggesting that you get to meet his parents via Zoom or something like that. While he’s there with them and can introduce y’all.
A gift would just be relatively meaningless, and might leave the parents wondering if they should’ve acknowledged you in some way. Whereas actually MEETING them via some online/phone app would actually CREATE a connection.
I think that’s sweet. Check with your boyfriend to see if they have any food allergies, then get them something from Hickory Farms/Omaha Steaks/Sherri’s Berries/etc.
Its a great idea. I always think a small house plant is a good idea.
You could either send something home baked with him for them or send a food/dessert basket to arrive for his visit with them. It would show you are thinking of them and contributing, but not being too much since they haven’t met you.
A fancy food gift basket with jam and nuts or stuff like that! I think it’s a nice gesture. With a little card saying you’re thankful for him being in your life and for them to have created him!
OP idk what the gift ends up being and I’m sure you’ll get a plethora of advice.
I appreciate you letting me know I am not alone in the wanting to honor the parents of your SO for the cool guy they made and raised. When I did this I was able to say to one parent directly, and for the other it was in a card.🤷🏻♀️
Awe, all I can do is wish you and this the best and longevity❤️💕
Home made cookies!
oh my god that would be so sweet! Yes totally do it!