Should I [35F] go out on a date with this guy [35M]?

12 comments

1. Classic love bombing tactic.

2. Are you prepare for a relationship ? Or just wanted to see how you two go ? Thinking about it.

3. Have you told him? You won’t know a thing until you tell him and see how he responds.

4. Seems to me this guy is looking for a relationship and you clearly arent. If you dont really want to talk to the guy im curious why youre even on a dating app to begin with?

5. Honestly you need to tell him that he’s being too pushy/ moving too fast. Based on how he responds to you would give you either enough red flags that you can just end it, or will have him back off and treat you in a way more comfortable to you. If you don’t like the way he’s acting now doesn’t mean you won’t like him irl, but this could also be something you’d have to deal with for the whole time you know him which might not be something you’re comfortable with

6. If you don’t like something, speak up (kindly) to tell him your preferences. If you’re going to the trouble of looking for people to date on apps and sites, then you need to be able to communicate cordially and openly with others. Many people would love the attention he is giving while some others would not. There is no way for us to know how he will respond or act toward you in “real life,” but it will be even more important to communicate your preferences and boundaries as you continue.

7. People here are pretty negative… what if he is just interested in you?? With in reason, I would try to spark conversation with some one I’m interested in as well. Given your reaction… and the fact he is clearly more interested that you – don’t go on the date.

8. I would ask the question, “if someone is coming on this strong this fast, is it because he likes ME, or because he likes the idea of being in a relationship?”

   Also: texting again and again until you respond isn’t “interest,” it’s manipulation.

   What I think you’re really wondering is if you want a relationship with someone who has this little impulse control and who wants to dive so quickly into a relationship.

9. Feel like maybe youre over thinking things or youre enabling/taking part.

   You dont like that he texts you good morning – yet you are keeping up the conversation.

   You dont like that he seems to attach easily at worst or at best is just super social – yet you don’t have a mstute conversation about it.

   You agree to see him despite harboring pretty negative feelings.

   Seems like youre leading them on, no? Be honest or do t waste their time imo.

10. Make sure you ask for separate checks. Not sure why you wouldn’t text him unless you weren’t interested? Doesn’t even seem like you want a relationship.

11. He’s coming on strong and it’s okay to feel uncomfortable about that. Personally good morning texts and continuing to text when he doesn’t get a response before even a first date is too much for me too.

    People saying it doesn’t seem like you want a relationship gotta chill. You’re allowed to want to take things slower than what this guy is doing and we all have other things other than texting someone we don’t even really know yet. And I do see it as a flag that the guy isn’t taking a hint, but it’s too early to know if it’s that he’s not mindful of boundaries, he just wants more communication than you do, or someone somewhere told him women like this.

    It’s up to you. Inevitably with dating through dating apps/online platforms, you will not know very much about someone and probably have a lot of first dates that lead nowhere. But is there anything that makes you see potential? If no, it might be a waste of both of your time.

12. Don’t waste your energy. He’ll only get more clingy.