my partner and i have been together 2 years in next January.
some background information as well in link in comments.
he mentioned he was going to see his family at the beginning of next month, and said I could come if I would like, but the end of the trip would be better.
i made it known to him that he is going to be gone for my birthday.
the night before my birthday we were supposed to go to a comedy show which was supposed to be part of my birthday gift.
he made a silly “oops” face and said ‘well…thats why i would have you come towards the end of the trip because that is when my family holiday party is.”
i said i would think about it. and he asked if i wanted him to cancel.
am i wrong to be kind of hurt by this?
i also had asked him what he would say if his parents asked him if he thinks he is going to marry me. and he said ‘hopefully’
a few weeks ago he told me there is an impediment in moving forward with me which hurt my feelings. he thinks i would be ‘getting everything i want’ in terms of a future but i believe i have tried to be accommodating (see attached post).
i told him i never really wanted to date more than 2 years so recently he said he would work on proposing by then, which confused me considering previous comments. he said he knows we can get there but doesn’t know if we are there.
i spent the first year of our relationship supporting him through a terrible period of his life where he was really injured. i took him to doc appointments, made food, communicated with his family, and provided emotional support.
what should i do? i love him dearly and feel really lost and alone
tl;dr: not sure if i need to end things with my partner and i am feeling devastated and alone
3 comments
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/y6qy9k/my_29f_partner_33m_isnt_sure_he_wants_to_live_by/
I don’t see him being busy on your birthday as a big deal. You’re both adults and life happens. Pick a more convenient time to celebrate your birthday if you care about celebrating birthdays. But you two are moving way too fast. You haven’t even lived together yet. Live together for a year before you talk about whether or not to get married.
My thoughts are simple. Sorry if I am straight forward. You need to just talk about these with your partner. It seems like you are thinking to much into things that are not there yet.
Yes. I apologize that sometimes us men don’t really think about our partner feeling. But at times, woman read into it to much. I know I will get heat from the ladies here. Most men are not as sensitive to our partners. Sometimes my wife tell me something and I tell her I will do some of the following.
1. Can we discuss it later?
2. Is it that weekend?
3. Omg, I total forget about it?
4. Ok Ok Ok Ok……. Wait what are we talking about.
This is just some of the things us guy say. As for your situation, just tell him what you want. Move forward and deal with. Based on your last post, you guys are talking about kids. He hasn’t even pop the question yet. You need to concentrate on your relationship and learn enjoy your time together. Let alone, plan where the kids need to be. Please slow down and enjoy the dating. Tell him what you want him to do. Plan it out. Just talk it out and don’t think into it to much. I am sorry if I offended anyone. These are just my thoughts.