Almost every time after I talk to someone at school, even just a quick “hi” in the hall i can’t stop thinking about how awkward I am and how many mistakes I made and how people perceive me.
It’s just an automatic thought that makes me feel like shit and hate myself after every conversation. I used to be fine with a trusted group of people but this is even starting to happen with my close friends and family.
I have no idea how to stop this, and I’m really concerned as I’m starting university soon and will have to start fresh and make a bunch of new friends. I have no idea how to get better socially and I just really need some guidance rn
2 comments
Are you insecure or very counscious of yourself?
Most people do not actually value the mistakes you think you did. Don’t worry about that.
Something that has worked for me to at least reduce the amount of anxiety from this on a daily basis is to pick certain environments where you repeatedly justify to yourself why it doesn’t matter. Like I’d pick a class where I didn’t really know anyone well and any time I stressed after saying something there, I’d just keep reminding myself “I’m not trying to impress anyone here.” Then I’d realize in another one of my classes that I wasn’t trying to impress anyone there, either, which makes another part of my day less stressful. More and more I was able to sort through stress by thinking “Does this matter here?” and if not, repeating that justification over and over in my head until I could cut the loop of internally freaking out.
This doesn’t work for everything and can’t completely stop the anxiety, but forcing myself into this line of thinking whenever I could really did help stop the constant buildup of stress. Eventually it can help you develop a few environments where you can at least prioritize the anxiety.