So lots of people are aware of the bdsmtest.org website where you get a general idea of your kinks. It’s silly and fun and in my experience with it, fairly accurate. My GF(18) sent me a screenshot of her results. We laughed and joked about it at first before I noticed one result in particular. She scored an 84% for non-monogamist. I pointed it out and she said that just because she likes it doesn’t mean she will act on it. My stupid self decided to respond in a very rude manner about how much I was disgusted by it. It is true I actually do feel incredibly uncomfortable by the thought of polygamy so much so it has actually made me gag when I imagined it. Of course because of my anger and anxiety I lashed out and failed to calmy explain that it makes me feel uncomfortable without shaming her. I realized my mistake too late and told her I was sorry for making her feel like a piece of shit. I am very ashamed for how I handled the situation. If she is polygamous I dont want to restrict her identity and be a controlling dick. We would have to go our separate ways as part of who I am is being strictly monogamist and that will never change. No matter how much we respected one another it would be like shoving a square peg into a round hole. I’m not sure where to go from here or how to approach the situation.
2 comments
You’ve apologised. If you’ve said what you said in the above to her, you’ve said enough. And sure, your sharp tongue lashed out and I can imagine what you said and that it was excessive and wrong. But at the same time, discovering that your partner has inclinations towards flipping polygamy is not a delightful discovery for anyone. That last thing I want is to be with someone who wants to fuck multiple other people, and likes the idea of it, but just isn’t planning on doing it. It’s a pretty core value you’re not aligned on.
You’re not ready for a relationship. Get some therapy to deal with your anger issues.