My (21M) best girl friend (19F) is flying to visit me at college in a few weeks and I don’t know if she’s interested romantically

I just want to be mentally prepared in case anything happens. I’ve been told multiple times by people of both sexes that I’m really bad at telling when someone is interested in me, that I’ve “fumbled the bag” a lot. This is why I’m turning to Reddit. Y’all should be honored 😂. I recognize that most of this lack of awareness stems from being insecure about how I look (I am 5’5” and unconsciously think that is undesirable) and downplaying why anybody would be interested in me.

For context about me and my friend “Jenna”, we’ve been friends since high school after meeting at a local summer camp about 4 years ago. We’re from the same city. I’m currently a junior in college while she’s a sophomore, and we go to school on opposite sides of the country; she stayed home while I flew to the East coast.

I will say that the reason I approached her in the beginning was because I found her extremely attractive, but ended up not actively pursuing anything because I was planning on attending university far away. From this situation, I’ve found one of the most supportive and attentive friends I could ask for and am very grateful to her.

Half a year ago, I got out of a really toxic relationship and was able to find time and mental strength to talk to my friends from home again. She was one of the first people I reconnected with. I’d say we started calling each other regularly, but just as much as my other friends in the beginning. It felt great talking to people I haven’t talked to in a long time.

About a month ago, I felt a sudden urge to rant about my ex. I told all my close friends from home about the things I would do for her to make her life easier (cooking every day, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, ordering/fixing/installing appliances, finding classes for her to take) and spend 6/7 days at her side working or hanging out with her, but she would still claim every other week that I hated spending time with her or that I didn’t really love her. I was spending most of my time and energy on trying to make her see that I did love her, but it came at the cost of stress at school and neglecting other friendships. Obviously I needed to leave; at the end I was completely out of love and just wanted to get out.

Of course, I also told Jenna about this. I needed someone to listen. It is also when I started to become suspicious. At the end of my rant, she exasperatedly says “Why can’t I find someone like you over here?”. I was, to say the least, shocked for a few seconds; luckily I was able to laugh it off and call her out for being sus. I’m not sure if this was just an effort to make me feel better. But I feel like I’ve seen a few hundred Reddit posts about this exact situation and I was stunned to find myself in this position. She then complains to me about all the terrible experiences she’s had back home with guys and we have a good time making fun of the dudes that didn’t treat her right. I didn’t mention her comment again for the rest of the call, but it was still on my mind.

A few weeks later, I jokingly tell her that she should come visit me (a 7 hour flight, mind you). To my surprise, she said yes! This was on the condition that I could find a medical conference for her to attend. Her scholarship would pay for it and she’d essentially be vacationing for free. I found one for her and she booked her tickets immediately. Now, this situation is a little confusing for me to think through. On one hand, she is dedicating a total of 14 hours of flying time to visit me, and she doesn’t really like planes (who does?). She is also taking 2 days out of her premed classes to visit, and I know she cares about grades a lot. Her scholarship is also not an unlimited supply, and she decided to use about 1/8 of the money when she could’ve saved it for her dream work-study to Korea. Her trip here is in a few weeks and I’ve definitely noticed an increase in volume of calls from her just to talk about whatever. Since she’s also offered me to stay in her hotel room during her time here (only two-bed rooms were left available). This is why I feel she may be attracted. She’s using a lot of her hard-earned time and money on little ol’ me. On the other hand, it is technically someone else paying for the trip, so it might just be an excuse for a vacation to her. It could be that she values her friendship with me enough to come out to visit me, even when it is somewhat inconvenient for her, and there’s no other intentions behind it.

I would also like to talk about the biggest reason why she may NOT be interested. A week before I gave Jenna my rant, I also confessed that I had a massive crush on someone I met at church here. Jenna was very interested and over the last month has given me advice about how to be less shy, how to tactfully ask to hang out, how to sneak in compliments, etc. Jenna often asks about updates, and I’ve been keeping her informed. My thought process is, nobody would actively self-sabotage to this degree, right? Would somebody give relationship advice to someone they’re interested in for the sake of pursuing another person that isn’t themselves? Additionally, she asks somewhat frequently for me to introduce her to a guy. I’ve tried brainstorming options with her but they’ve all my ideas so far have been rejected.

Please help me figure this out, my brain is a mess.

TLDR, best girl friend is coming to visit from across the country. She demonstrates possible interest by sacrificing time, education, work, money, comfort, and effort in order to come see me and has begun calling me much more often. She demonstrates possible disinterest by providing advice on how to get closer to my crush.