Title says it all… I’m not sure my husband even likes me anymore.
Every other day there is a new complaint or offense. I’m sure that some of these things absolutely have merit (like any relationship) and need to be addressed, however a constant barrage of complaining at this point has me overwhelmed and feeling nagged. When I try to explain myself or have a back and forth conversation he gets mad at me. There is no communication or mutual understanding, just him constantly complaining.
These complaints are so frequent that I started marking them in a calendar to see if I was overreacting or exaggerating. The longest period of time he has gone with out nagging/complaining is 2 days. It is literally an every other day pattern.
We have been together for 15 years and this is new to the last year. I feel he is setting himself up for an excuse to have an affair based on the complaints and his comments about what other women might feel toward him.
Just when I feel things are better he is right back to complaining about me.
I don’t know what to do at this point. I’m so worn out and beaten down.
4 comments
I am sorry you are going through this. It is always had to know what is going through someone else’s head. When he complains do you ever call him out on it? Like “this house is a mess” then you say “when was the last time you cleaned up?” Sometimes when I get rude with my wife she comes right back at me and puts me in my place.
Couples therapy? It sounds like you’ve tried to tell him how you’re feeling (right?). That can help communication if he wants to make it work and is just struggling to be understood and understand you. If he doesn’t care about how hurt you are and how sad you are, there’s nothing that will make him care.
I can relate…but instead of complaining mind does it in a sarcastic manner and just goes on
Tell him you’re gonna announce every chore and every thing that you do for him. Then when you do it, tell him if he is in person, or text him that you did if he is not. Then it’s his job to thank you. He needs to put appreciation deposits into the bank so it does not run empty. You need to announce it so he remembers all the little things you do for him, and that you’re doing more than he is remembering that you do. It will also help him put things into context like it’s not the end of the world if one small thing isn’t exactly to his liking. Also he should also announce when he does something and then you thank him. Or if you notice he did something but didn’t mention it, tell him you noticed and that you are grateful that he was thinking about you and your partnership