I’m 13 and I live in the Netherlands. I have a classmate that tries to fit in with my friend group, and often we do stuff with him. I do my best to include him in stuff we do. The thing is, he is just very different. He is Russian and has lived there for a good portion of his life. His sense of humor and just his general behaviour is very different from ours. But I feel increasingly guilty for ignoring his jokes, seeing him sit by himself, not answering when he asks to join our Minecraft server, etc. I don’t really know what to do, because I used to be the weird kid in my primary school. My current best friend who I have known for almost 10 years now, also avoided doing stuff with me around the age of 6-11. We get along very very well now, but in primary school I really had no one to do stuff with, and whenever I see my classmate, I think of how sad I was to have no one to do stuff with around 6-11. The thing is, I really cant stand him, as bad as I feel for saying that. Does anyone have tips to make me feel less bad for ignoring him, or maybe ways to include him without engaging with him to much?
1 comment
Being rude to someone is different from being close friends with them.
You can still actively listen, encourage, support, and engage with this person without necessarily spending every possible minute with them. Be open to their experiences and learning from them, and you will have served your purpose. Just because you don’t click doesn’t mean you have to ignore and mistreat them; be transparent and find a common interest.