Hello all
So I’ve recently gotten back to looking for hookups/etc on dating apps and even have someone I might meet up with soon but I have a few issues
I have scars and wounds/scabs on my body. The scars on my legs and arms I don’t really care about, but I also have scars on my chest and crotch which make me nervous. Worse than that though, is I have dermatillomania (AKA I pick at my skin when anxious). Unfortunately I have a “breakout” on my stomach and then another closer to my vagina.
Is this something I should tell to my hookup before we meet? And if so, how?
I’m afraid of a bad reaction when seeing them because my body already isn’t great so it’s nerve racking enough as it is. There’s also no emotional aspect to it as it’s not someone I’ve met before/have an already established relationship with.
Thanks!
3 comments
Yeah probably something that you would want to tell them, having your hookup back out because they think you’re a scabby drug addict would hurt
I also have scars and dermatillomania and I’ve never mentioned anything beforehand. Although I usually request we keep the lights off if it’s just casual. When I’m trying to have an emotional connection, then we keep lights on.
I struggle with the same thing but I used to just try to “prep” in advance. It doesn’t always work but I try to focus my picking where I can hide it or where it doesn’t matter like my arms and shoulder and back (to me it doesn’t matter I can hide it with clothes) rather than destroying my face or other exposed areas. Immediately after a “picking session” I always ice the area for a little to calm down the skin and lessen the redness. I take a warm shower afterwards to make sure I have clean skin and will apply a sensitive lotion to damp skin after. Finally, use something like aquaphor or Vaseline on like the open ones/ scabs… for me that makes them heal and go away faster and reduces my scarring! (I used to use Neosporin and loved it but I read it wasn’t the best option buttttt I just thought I’d still mention it bc I used it forever lol)
Added tip: pimple patches have been a life saver for me. I have a hard time not absolutely destroying my face but since I started buying the pimple patches I just put one on any visible blemishes that might tempt me into going at my face and I stay away:) I will like “search” or feel my face all the time with my fingers and subconsciously pick too so the patches keep me from doing that as well. I’m sure they could be used elsewhere on your body!! I put them on scabs or scars too when they’re healing (again probs not what they’re for I know but they help me😊)