Hey all
As the title suggests I’m currently dating and in a serious relationship. My SO and I have some healthy boundaries when it comes to opposite sex friends (for example: not sharing with opposite sex friends issues in our relationship, not being too vulnerable, etc). The bare minimum basically.
However I’ve been feeling a bit unsettled ever since I noticed something in my relationship. I’m the initiator in my relationship in terms of talking, meeting up, etc. I never thought much of it until my SO and I started making a new friend. This friend is the same gender as me. I’ve noticed my SO is very initiative with this person both in terms of group hangouts and one on one initiation (texting and meeting up for coffee).
I don’t mind us having this friend but I’m unsettled by my SO showing all this initiative with a friend when they struggles showing me that. The unsettling feeling only gets worse given that this friend shares my gender.
We’ve talked about this and my SO has agreed to initiate more and so far they have, however I can’t shake the feeling that this is a bad sign for the future. What do you all think?
2 comments
You brought up an issue and they are now doing better at initiating. Sounds like problem solved. If you have other concerns like they’re more interested in them, bring that up directly
Does your partner not initiate with you or do you just always initiate first?
Similar in idea but different in execution