I have this pattern where I will make a female friend and get really excited that I have someone to talk to because I’m autistic and have difficulty with the process of making friends. Then I start really enjoying the conversations, and talk to them all the time. Then sometimes like non-friendship stuff happens.
Like just recently one friend kept asking what I wanted in a GF and kept excessively complimenting me for a few days, to the point where a bunch of people were making comments about it. Or the one woman who held my hands for like half an hour while I talked. I don’t know what happened but it felt weird. After that happened the friendships felt worse and I felt like I was I was a creep.
I just want to make friends, and talk about my interests and life with friends. Am I doing something bad?
2 comments
Something doesn’t line up here. On both examples you provided you describe the events as if the girl initiated a flirtatious interaction. However you then proceed to say you felt like a “creep”.
One is a creep when they are forcing sexual tension with someone without reciprocation nor approval. In your scenario this is not the case. You are either leaving out important details or you are picking up the wrong signals.
Assuming the latter, the female friends are interested in being more than friends. If you just want friends then you must set your boundaries and make them clear. If you just want to be friends, reject flirtatious behavior such as hand grabbing. Your lack of objection will signal the other person that you are OK with this, hence resulting in more flirtatious behavior.
When girls you wanna be friends with do stuff like that, let them know you only want to be their friend.
And nah you’re not doing anything bad nor are you a creep. Just make boundaries more explicit if you’re not comfortable with certain behavior.