I am confused, is it ok for a woman to approach guys?

17 comments

1. Sure, especially in dance classes/dance parties. It’s normal. Many women have asked me to dance with them. Salsa classes

2. Just approach. Whats the worst that can happen?

3. there is nothing wrong in that

4. If a man can do it, a woman can do it. I wish women would approach men more, it’d make me feel good at least

5. You can do whatever you want. These restrictions are self-imposed and entirely in your head.

6. Literally anywhere.

7. Yes.

8. I have never been the approaching type, but if that’s you, then you should do it. If they don’t like it they aren’t a good match for you.

9. > cause what if they think you are ugly/not attracted to you?

   Then what? It’s the same for the guys that do it lol.

10. Yes.

11. I would say that it is a pretty good idea to approach guys and I want to tell you something about your ˋwhat if they think you are ugly/not attracted to you?ˋ that you are afraid of approaching guys because of this is a fear and with it a feeling that is valid, so i don’t wanna say that your feeling don’t mean something, but it doesn’t say that they are right. When you don’t act because you fear that it could go wrong is like saying that you don’t throw a coin while calling that it lands on head because it could land on tails instead. You would take a percentage chance and say that the outcome is guaranteed. Even if you try to list up reasons why they shouldn’t like you doesn’t mean that they do it, since it is a list of things that you don’t really like about yourself. But who said that they like and dislike the same things as you do. I often am way to harsh to myself and think way to bad about myself, which is why I often am to anxious to talk to people, but always say jokingly to myself ´But hey who said that they have a good taste in people?´ while walking up to them.

12. It is perfectly fine, just consider that he may not be interested. Stay casual and don’t force yourself upon him. Have a little bit of fun time together. You can only positively surprise him with your openness if you won’t act desperate or pushy.

13. > aren’t supposed to do that cause what if they think you are ugly/not attracted to you

    and just how is this different for men?

14. So youre basically asking men “hey men, who get rejected literally constantly and are jus expected to carry that and smile still…. How do I, a woman, whove en mass said we dont like being approached bc its creepy, not get rejected even a single time without fail bc i cant handle rejection even though i expect you to be able to handle it”

    This is annoying. Figure it out.

15. That is illegal in 20 states.

16. I think a lot of people downvote threads like this because they just can’t believe it’s real, but y’all would be amazed at how many women have had this line of thinking drilled into their heads from a young age. Probably about 50% of my friends subscribe to the ridiculous idea that they cannot and should not approach men with romantic interest under any circumstance. There are millions of real, smart women out there who fully believe this myth and are extremely hard to convince otherwise because their mothers and sisters all tell them the same thing. When a respectable authority figure in your life tells you something you tend to believe them no matter the evidence to the contrary, that’s just how it is.

    OP, the answer is that most men will be very flattered if you approach them with interest. I think women have a very easy time meeting men during any sort of club/hobby activity. Sports are amazing but there is a higher barrier to entry and the men are usually less available since fit/active/social is a very attractive combination. Bars are great for hookups but bad for relationships.

17. Are women people?