So, I (21 F) and my bf (21) have a mix group of friends, gals and pals.
its been almost a year but weve known each other all highschool
My bf is, to me humble lol, a very handsome man with a matching personality. In our group one of the guys in Bi and the other I’m not really sure? He says he is straight but I’m not trying to assume just because of what he says or acts so ill say he is straight for right now.
The friend that is Bi, C for short
has expressed before that he is attracted to my bf because of how great a person he is and C from time to time will “flirt” with him
one time he said straight up in the gc he loved him to which my bf did say it back but he said I love you to all our friends
ive expressed before in a joking manner to my bf about haha i think im a bit jealous of C cuz C will always ask or look to my bf for help in things like shopping, driving him places, or mental health help
and no i dont have any problems with that and C is my friend but there was a short moment where C would just take a lot of my bfs time the short time he has when hes not in school or working away and i hope that doesnt make me seem selfish i havent expressed these deeper feelings to him cuz idw seem like i am selfish or that i dont care about C i do we get along fine just ya know ig?
Then the straight friend, X for short will say he has known him longer or make passing remarks such as “Oh we can do this, op doesnt have to know” in the gc and he also has said to my bf he loves him then said he loves anyone and everyone he just has love for others
but these two only makes these remarks to my bf
my bf is attracted to me and loves me dearly i dont have any doubts he would cheat on me or leave me thats not the problem
i feel…off whenever they do this towards him and i told my bf and he said it is just jokes and he loves me
to which i replied yea i know you dont feel that way but like idw see them continously doing it in my face like haha but it kinda rings a bit in my mind
he said he would respect my wishes of asking them two to tone it down a bit but he also said i do the same with my female friends
i asked if it bothered him cuz if it did i would stop though I dont do what C or X do its typical black girl hyping black girl things maybe that is flirting? I dont want to seem like a hypocrite or that im dismissing what I do
he said no it doesnt bother him or care because he knows how I feel about him
but he asked is it because im jealous of them
i said isnt it kinda the same if it was two girl friends stating they were jokingly flirting with him?
and tbh idw be jealous cuz its always painted in a toxic light and i dont want to seem or be toxic
im not saying “oh get rid of them” because again they are my friends too and i vibe with them and id never tell him who he cant hang with nor do i try to take all of his time because he is very busy we only actually see each other on the weekends and call through out the week and such
i just dont rly like when they do that towards him
so am i jealous? and is it a toxic jealously?
and dont blame or say anything bad about my bf in this regard he is the most loving caring and non toxic bf ive had and he does fix and change things that he does if it hurts me as i do for him
its been on my mind the past few days and so i wanted and outsiders look at it
and if it is a toxic jealously how do i fix it? i wanna be the best i can for him as i grew up in a very toxic household idw bring it to a relationship
thank you for reading
TL;DR :2 guy friends continously jokingly flirt with my bf and im not sure if im jealous or if it is a toxic jealousy?