I want to improve communication in my marriage. I feel like a lot of things would improve and be clear if I can openly communicate with my husband. But sometimes I just exhaust my myself with over thinking that whatever I want to say or ask I don’t and the issue just gets swept under the rug.
I feel like superficial I can talk to him. But having real and serious discussion is hard. I always think I will start a discussion, today is the day but I end overthinking and exhausting myself that I don’t end up saying anything. I always think oh this is the right time, the right environment and with all the planning and overthinking leads to no where.
I guess how can I stop the overthinking and actually take steps to talk
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Every Sunday my wife and I schedule check up sessions. We know that during that time we will discuss normal day to day stuff as well as anything else we just couldn’t fit in elsewhere. A lot of times it’s a conversation about nothing in particular but others she has grievances she wants to be heard on or I do. It just works for us. We know what we’ll be doing at 7pm on Sunday night needed or not. It’s like I’m home therapy without a mediator.
Cometment is nothing without fallow through. Not just with relationships, but with yourself as well.
I write everything down. It get me out of my head and onto something tangible. Something I am able to see and focus on.
Men and women communicate differently. Sometimes my wife wants me to listen and just listen. So I do. Then sometimes she wants me to listen then says “so, were you listening? What do you think?” Now I have to figure out what response she is expecting or I’m a dead man.
I come home from work and my wife says “how was your day” I say “ok” then I say “how was your day ” and I get a 20 minute synopsys of everything she did all day.