So to preface I do think I’m good at starting conversations if it’s in certain settings. So like if I’m at work and a new person is there I would say I’m good at starting small talk and having some conversation. Or if say in class (I’m in college) I can sometimes start conversations with other people sitting next to me or if we’re doing an assignment or something. Furthermore, if someone random comes up and starts conversations I can keep it going for the most part.
However, when it comes to initiating talking to someone random say at the bus stop or especially when it comes to someone I find attractive I just can’t do it. And I know partially why, I have a very irrational fear of rejection as well as breaking boundaries just because of past experiences especially cuz of my last relationship. However, I also just kinda realized that continually making eye contact with someone and not approaching them is most likely creepy.
So is there any tips for starting convos? I just feel like with those two groups I’m going in blind in terms of what to talk and I’ve read I somewhere that it’s not necessarily always the best to just go up and ask for their number without doing some small talk first
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Yea staring or making repeated eye contact with no follow up is a bit creepy ngl. Random small talk is just that random small talk. On a bus could be just a simple weather is nice/bad today etc if you noticed something interesting about a person just come up and be like hi I noticed blah and was curious. If I see a cool tattoo I’ll come up to someone and be like Hi, I think your tattoo is really cool. Where did you get it done? Obviously if someone looks busy or has their headphones in they probably don’t wanna talk. If it’s someone attractive just compliment them on something. Hi you have a cool tattoo, bag, hat, style, whatever. Just practice.