For the last two weeks my boyfriend (34M) has been really snappy towards me (30F) out of no where.
He either sounds really annoyed, agitated, or sarcastic when we talk sometimes with no good reason and it has me feeling like i’m walking on eggshells. For the last two years up until this point he was very goofy and bubbly, always kind so this behavior has me worried. we’ve had conversations about his sudden behavior and i expressed how him treating me that way makes me feel like he’s into someone else or at the very least not into me anymore. He reassured me that there is nobody else that he’s into and that he’s still very much in love with me. He’s never given me the reason to think he’d be unfaithful and he’s always been very transparent about things so i’m honestly so confused about the whole thing. I’ve considered him being stressed and he did admit to being stressed during one of our last conversations but honestly i’ve never treated him that way when i’ve gone through really stressful times especially because we’ve always been there for each other. i’ve seen very little progress after our conversation and i honestly don’t know what to do, it’s starting to affect our relationship as it’s making me not want to talk to him or see him as much because it makes me really sad when he talks to me that way. i’ve offered to give him space & he immediately refused it, i tried to check in on how he’s feeling emotionally and mentally and he stated he was a little stressed but that he was fine. Not sure what else to do here.
i’m still hopeful that we can work through this, any advice on how to go about it or if anyone has been through this would be helpful.
3 comments
Seems like he’s taking it out on you. If he knows how it affects you and still doesn’t change then that’s more up to him. It’s obviously making you feel worse. The only thing you can do is telling him, which you’ve already done, but if he doesn’t work on it then there’s not much else you can do if you want to stay with him.
He needs to know that you can’t help him unless he actually opens up about what he’s feeling stressed about. I think you’re doing the best you can to be there for him but there’s not much else you can do unless he helps you help him.
If the problem persists, I’d spend some time apart until he’s ready to open up.
Tell him if he’s going through something then he needs to tell you because him treating you like that is unacceptable. You will not be his emotional punching bag. Literally tell him in the moment “you will not speak to me like that”. But really it sounds like now you’re out of the honeymoon stage his real colors are coming out or something is going on he’s not telling you about