I made a post yesterday asking why so many men discourage others from approaching women in real life. A popular sentiment that I noticed in the comments from many men was that “you have to be attractive” or else it doesn’t work. What does that mean, though? How do you define/quantify something as subjective as attractiveness?
To me, there are so many factors that go into being attractive (face, body, fashion sense, fragrance, intelligence, confidence, conversational skills, etc.) that it’s too simple to just say “you have to be attractive” in order to be able to approach women successfully. Are you simply referring to physical attractiveness? Asking because that’s incredibly subjective.
Also, to the folks mentioning getting caught up with sexual harassment, I don’t really know what to tell you. I have never in my life seen/heard of a guy being accused of sexual harassment simply for trying to amicably talk to a woman.
8 comments
Easy enough to test.
​
Make a tinder profile … How many right swipes do you get? Most guys get very few, while attractive guys get quite a lot.
​
How many do you get?
The problem is the 0 likes in 6 months guys, they tend to come off as creepy in public so we advice them not to do it so we save girls the trouble.
A lot of Redditors that have trouble with dating assume it’s because they aren’t attractive enough.
It may be true. It may not be.
Either way, it’s a way of rationalizing their lack of success as they can point to the thing they don’t have and say that it’s the reason.
The problem is that a lot of the time they are missing out on the other factors that might be influencing their lack of success which they could actually work on to improve things.
The internet says mean things
It means you need to be well groomed and suavely dressed. It’s called drip.
Of course physical attractiveness is subjective, but not incredibly, people don’t really strain too far from what is considered conventionally attractive in their preferences. And as for intelligence, confidence and conversational skills: they won’t help much, if the person has already decided that you are simply not attractive enough for them, they just won’t engage with you.
I think its usually meant to refer to current beauty trends. So like. Relatively fashionable clothes, whatever body/face is touted as most handsome or whatever.
Well men care about you looking good foremost. Looking attractive is all based on proportional ratios. You can measure them yourself to see if yiu look okay. Then theres other stuff like you listed above. I think men care more about face but if yiu have a creapy body then it kinda cancels it out. But anyone can get a good body. Its rare if people arent able to. I dont know what you look like but even if you are ugly someone will find you pretty.