Do a lot of Americans especially Southerners look down on those who were born out of wedlock? and call them bastards?

41 comments

1. In a country this large I’m sure it happens somewhere, but it’s not common.

2. No one can help the circumstances of their birth. That doesn’t seem like something many Americans would care about. In fact I’d venture to say it’s antithetical to our ideals.

3. I’ve never seen this happen

4. no.

5. Most don’t. In at least some regions, having children out of wedlock is discouraged but considered better than elective abortion.

6. We’re not in the 50s anymore

7. lol no

8. An older relative of mine was born out of wedlock and was judged for it when she attended school, according to another relative. This would have been the 1950’s. Edit: For the record, she didn’t live in the South.

   Today, most of the country would consider treating a person badly because of the circumstances of their birth to be despicable behavior. That’s not to say it doesn’t happen, but it would be way outside of mainstream expectations.

   Edit: Plus, if you check the statistics, a lot of people are born to parents who weren’t married. It’s just not that notable anymore.

9. Born and raised in the South and lived here my whole life and never heard anybody say anything about it.

10. You’ll find a few people who look down at and judge others for anything they can imagine, those people are jerks and not worth being concerned about. They’re probably in the Venn diagram of people also against abortion and premarital sex, unfortunately the world doesn’t conform to their narrow rules.

11. I’m pretty sure that hasn’t been a thing since like 1950.

12. No. They still love to hate single moms, but that’s usually as far as the judgement extended in my experience (as a formerly young single southern mom)

13. Not too many of the younger generations do, at least. Older ones, I’ve listened in on older grandmas and grandpas eviscerate someone because of it.

    They won’t say it to their faces, but they’ll talk about it behind their backs. Thankfully, this also is pretty rare among older populations. If anything, a lot of the older people I’ve listened to tell me of stories of when they were young, which is pretty endearing.

14. I’m from the upper Midwest and everyone born out of wedlock isn’t allowed to take their father’s surname and instead takes the name Snow so everyone knows and judges them for it.

15. I really dislike that hateful Southern stereotypes are so perverse in our culture that even foreigners are picking up on them and believing it.

16. Bastard is certainly a word you would use to insult someone but no I’ve never heard it used literally like that. Lots of kids are born to unmarried parents these days, it’s not a big deal.

17. No. I was born out of wedlock and never in over 50 years of my life has anybody given a shit about it. It’s not a reflection on me in any way whatsoever.

18. It’s not the 1950’s anymore.

19. Is this a “Why are Southerners so socially backwards and judgemental?” question? It feels like it.

20. In my experience, there’s a lot more compassion for fatherless children, divorced or otherwise absent.

21. No. This whole southern are backwards thing by foreigners is getting tired.

22. Only weird fundamentalists do stuff like that …. Definitely not normal regardless of where you are in the US

23. No, where did you hear that?

24. I would never look down on someone because of something they had no control over and/or can’t “correct,” like the circumstances of their birth.

    That being said, intact and stable families are better for society and children than single parents (Please, no “But wut about abusive parents… blah… blah… blah!” I’m obviously not talking about that.)

25. [deleted]

26. Must be Shit on Southerners Saturday.

27. Not as much anymore, but some older people might. My wife and I lived together for a couple years before getting married. A lot of people in her family stated that we were living in sin.

28. Lived all my life in the South, its 2022 and that perception of the South does not exist.

29. No, and stereotyping southerners as unenlightened hyper-conservatives is just as outdated.

30. I’d prefer if people were married when having children and the divorce stats aren’t nearly as bad as Reddit would have you believe. Wouldn’t blame the child for their parents decisions.

31. Everyone saying “we’re not in the 50s” lol.

    In most instances, no. *But* I lived around and attended an extremist Baptist church in north Florida as a kid. I wasn’t born out of wedlock, but I was conceived out of wedlock. My youngest two siblings were also born out of wedlock.

    We weren’t called bastards directly, but there were plenty of instances where it was implied and our mother was constantly disparaged for it.

32. If you’re pregnant and unmarried, it’ll be discussed. If you’re pregnant and married, that’s discussed too. I don’t know if anyone labels the child because of it.

33. I do not look down on bastards but do judge their parents harshly for failing to meet their marital obligations for their child. Bring back shotgun weddings!

34. I’ve never seen it happen. I think it’s really more of a movie trope these days.

    Now, I *do* hear people from all parts of the US use “bastard” as a general curse word/insult- but it’s usually directed at total strangers, and usually while they’re driving. So they don’t mean it literally. It’s just being used as a replacement for asshole.

35. To the extent any harsh judgment is passed out (and it very seldom would be) it would be towards the parents for having an unplanned pregnancy, not towards the baby that came from it.

36. I call them bastards more out of a joke. I have met people who do look down on them, but they’re few and far between. Mostly those extremist Southern Baptists oh the edge of town

37. No one should ever be judged on how they were born, no one has any control over that. I was raised to respect everyone no matter what their background is, and I’ve never known anyone to be looked down on because of the circumstances of their birth.

38. I am 48 years old. I have never heard anyone call a child born to unwed parents a bastard. Not from the south.

    I don’t think most people care much these days about whether parents were married, got divorced or whatever.

39. Lived in the south most of my life and never heard anyone call a child of unwed parents a bastard, although that word has a double meaning as in a person (usually a man) who is loud, unpleasant, a jerk, the type you just don’t want to be around. Heard it thrown around in that context a couple of times.

    As far as the other, outside of extreme religious groups, no, never heard of anyone looking down on those children or calling them names but even in those groups I doubt they would. It’s not the child’s fault, they’d be more apt to say disparaging things about the parents.

40. Uhhh no. My parents weren’t married when I was born and no one has ever called me a bastard. At least not to my face. 😂😂

    These questions are getting crazy. And what’s with all the Southern hate?

41. Not that I know of.