Hi everyone,
Long-time lurker here but I’m looking for some advice! I (22f) met a guy(22m) on Bumble a little over a month ago. We’ve since gone on multiple dates, we text all day long, talk on the phone, etc. It’s only been a month and we’re both incredibly close to each other and know private details of each other’s lives.
We’ve talked about long-term goals as I often find it frustrating when those wants aren’t explicitly said (I don’t want to waste anyone’s time and I also don’t want mine wasted), and we have very similar wants. Now- I’m not unreasonable, he says that he’s new to dating which is true, and that he doesn’t want to rush into anything official too quickly. I haven’t asked him to as I also agree that it’d be a little fast, but my problem is more so his use of dating apps. After meeting him and talking to him for around 2 weeks I was very confident about how much I liked him and I stopped using dating apps. I unfortunately have a bad habit of looking at his profiles and seeing his location updating, meaning that he’s still checking them regularly. I guess I feel a little jealous even though I don’t really have an official reason to.
I am entirely understanding that we are not together officially, I just want some opinions on whether this is reasonable or not. He says he wants to be with me and very frequently compliments me, we’ve been physically active together, amongst other things, but he says he just doesn’t want to be official right now. I’m a little confused by it all and I know I should probably ask him about being exclusive and whatnot but I guess I’d rather get some opinions beforehand, part of me feels silly but I felt so sure of him and I think it’s confusing me a little bit. I’m hesitant to bring it up because I don’t want to feel pushy but at the same time, I’m wondering if I should be starting to date other people in addition to him, I’m not really sure if he is or if he’s just using the apps.
I hope this post makes some ounce of sense and I’d appreciate any input or opinions that anyone has. I’m open to answering any questions if anyone has them.
1 comment
Makes sense, I am in a similar ish position Male (27) with a Female (30), difference is were both goneith the flow, eventually I want a relationship and she doesn’t believe in monogamy(always been in exclusive relationship).
I think if you think his worth it, have a chat and see what he replies. However if it’s not going down the path you want, you way have to be willing to walk away.