Is there an evolutionary reason? I haven’t tried it but I have a great desire to, bf is unfortunately not so keen but I wanted to understand more why I’m having these feelings. My bf thinks it’s not natural behaviour to love someone and want to it, in his opinion which is why it doesn’t do anything for him. I’m the opposite, I want someone who loves me to do it to me but I’d like to understand why? 🙂
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Girl I feel you I have also had men deny me rough sex and use “i love you too much to hurt you” as an excuse. I have genuinely found most men want gentle loving sex and are only forcing them selves to get into rough sex because thats what they have been told women want, thats what a lot of men have admitted to me when they felt comfortable. I could be wrong and many men do love it, but I have only encountered those dudes in casual situations I have genuinely never had a dude I was in a relationship with want to rough me up or degrade me . Most were uncomfortable at that idea. And for your main question a lot of women like rough sex its perfectly normal. Communication is key.
My wife didn’t know she wanted rough sex until we were married for three years. To this day she doesn’t why she likes it rough, she only knows she loves it.
If you’re looking for a deeply analytical answer, only you can probably answer that by looking inward (or with the help of someone you can be vulnerable, emotionally, with).
If you’re not looking for a deeply analytical viewpoint, you like what you like and that’s it.
Kinks do not require an explanation or justification. You were born that way. Just enjoy it.
It’s in your genes. A female is physically weaker than a male so she looks for a male who is strong to provide for and protect her. So masculinity and strength are traits that women love and crave from men. That being said, there’s no better time to put a male under the test than during sex. Especially in this modern age where a man can be blamed just for a simple gaze towards a woman hence the ways of trying to prove himself worthy aren’t as diverse as they were 100 or 1000 years ago (feminism and bs).
Another thing to mention is that rough sex is related to the amount of sexual attraction and lust a man has toward his female partner. So in your mind, the rougher your partner is the more he is attracted to you and the more you think he likes sex with you which is true (well, at least for me).
It’s evolutionary hold over from animal sex. Just like my desire to grab my GF by the hair and hard fuck her brains out. I don’t consciously want to hurt her. The thought of hurting her makes me recoil. But the urge to do that is there. It’s a conundrum for me. I’m not consciously comfortable doing it. The only time i might ask is if I’m drunk when my inhibitions are turned down.
Other option is it mirrors your first sexual encounter.
Why not? Pain is somewhat pleasurable especially when pleasure is happening. Sex can be slightly painful even when it’s not rough. Something primal about fucking so hard that it’s so pleasurable and it hurts.
Would rough sex make you feel more desired? Usually something like that but what do i know.
Maybe you’re bf will start to like it.
First girl that wanted rough also kind of eased me into it and I also started to like it.
Instead of questioning it, you should explore it.
My ex was a submissive. She loved it. We would always switch it up from rough to handcuffs to gag ball and blindfold. She didn’t know why either.