My so-called “friends” never ask me to hang out or to do something together. When I asked the same question in Quora a while ago, people answered me with “the reason is you, you don’t ask them to hang out and give less effort in the friendship”. Fair enough it was true, so I started to make plans myself and overall be more active, but not only that 9/10 of the times my plan got rejected, but also nothing changed they still don’t initiate and don’t ask me to hang.
(Also the same is with texting I always either text first or get ghosted for a while)
What to do?
4 comments
If you’ve initiated and still don’t get that reciprocated, maybe it’s time to surround yourself with people who are just like you or like-minded in some aspects that fall in line with your values and such.
Not your friends, move on
Friendships/relationships(non romantic) are also about time value input. If you recently put in effort that’s great, it can equally take as long to recieve your desired outcome. Take the interval time interacting with said people. Your new found eagerness to be more engaged, if not just be for you, it it’s also new to those you interact with. Most humans need time to proccess and accept change and trust it.
Just as long as it to you to regocnize you were not active in what you were seeking and now that you are recognizing, others might also need time to adjust. Your new learned behavior is not just new to you, but to those same friends as well.
Asses determine the people you want to be friends with, level/type of friendship- see if you put in the same energy you are expecting to recieve(and not only when it it’s convient for you). Make differnt and new friends.
Yep, it’s time to expand your friend circle. You don’t have to forget about your existing friends, but I’d start looking for new friends.