As a 32F who’s never been in a committed relationship, what are some things men want when looking for a life partner?

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  3. Basically a best friend who I’m also attracted to, I guess. There is a lot wrapped up in the “friend” part there but that’s really the core of it.

  8. Good roommate, good lover, good financial partner.

    It’s hard to find all three in the same woman. And even then, it’s nearly impossible for her to continue being that forever.

    Layer on top of that co-parenting. Oh boy

  11. For me it was sense of humor, intelligence, empathy for fellow humans and general physical fitness as a baseline. Basically some one to laugh with, have deep convos with, is kind to people and go to outdoorsy things on occasion.

    The one I found has those and was a metal head / nerd like me. Those were all bonuses.

  14. Someone with which to make memories with. A best friend who I can laugh with, cuddle up on the sofa with, go to interesting places and generally enjoy our lives together. Seems like a tall order, but I had this for 18 years before she cheated on me. Now quite certain that I’ll never have this again.

  17. Your post history mentions a boyfriend, moving in together, possible engagement, and you call his mom your mother-in-law.

    What does “never been in a committed relationship” mean to you?

  19. Affection. Be verbal and physical. Tell him he’s handsome in those pants. Scratch his head/back. Tend to him when he’s sick. Tell him that you miss him when you’re both at work or whoever you’re separated. Love getting a text in the middle of the workday from my wife saying she misses me. Just genuinely show that you care about him. Simple as saying I love your hugs when he’s giving you a bear hug. Also, just putting this out there, if a guy is having a rough day then a good ol fashion (not the drink) will turn him around 180 degrees.

  20. Someone who is always playful: Teasing (in a positive way), touch, positive admiration for one another.

  21. I want a true partner. Life can be very rough. I need someone by my side who can weather the thick and thin.

    I don’t want a princess that needs to be taken care of, I want a capable women who can take care of herself. That also implies that i need to be able to take care of myself.

    When she needs help I want to be there to help her, but when I need help I want someone by my side that can help me in return.

    She needs to be her own person, and I need to be my own person. Together we should make a better couple than individual people tho. We should balance each other’s strengths and weakness.

    Similar values and morals are important as well. They don’t all have to match (my wife’s and mine do not) but they should at least be in the same ballpark.

  22. Personally: offsprings, submissive partner, someone who let’s me have the Final word,looks after the offsprings,doesn’t give me endless headaches,Loyalty

  23. Stability, commitment, affection (including sex), independence (where neither partner is overly reliant on the other), loyalty and trust.

  24. So you had sex with him for years as his friend, but the whole time he had a gf/fiance? So, basically you were his side piece and he cheated on his fiance for years with you and possibly other women.

    How was the status of this relationship never questioned? You should def ask for committment before sex in the future

  26. Sex, sammich, and peace. If you are really bad at one of them, you probably will have to settle for a man you don’t want.

  27. It’s hard to say because every man is different and wants different things.

    But, the baseline that I can atleast say on my own behalf is that I mostly want someone I simply enjoy being around.

    For me, that not only means being able to have interesting conversation, having fun, doing fun things, being able to enjoy each other’s interests to a degree, watching eachother grow and move forward in life, but also very importantly, the ability to just simply relax around her. Which is the part I think warrants the most nuance.

    I’m sure I don’t speak for few men when I say our day-to-day lives can be very stressful and demanding. It’s unfortunate side effect of the factory-era 40 hour workweek combined with the type of work we commonly do.

    I don’t want to cheat or neglect anyone. But sometimes I really just need to sit on the pier, head empty, total piece and quiet, and not have to feel guilty for letting my partner hang, because I feel like I simply just need this without needing some valid excuse.

    I’ve had partners in the past who unfortunately showed very little understanding to this.

  29. >life partner

    Let’s back that up to “committed relationship” for now.

    Here it all is:

    – A teddy bear. When we’re sad or worried we want someone to hug and hug us back.

    – A partner. Someone who is on our side. Someone who enhances our innate qualities. Someone to share life with. Food, vacations, TV shows, movies, thunderstorms, a cup of coffee – all of those are better with someone else that appreciates them.

    – Positivity. Someone who finds joy in little things and spreads it to us.

    – Blowjobs. They’re the best feeling in the world.

    – Sex. A close second to blowjobs.

  30. Depends on the guy.

    Personally I want someone I can spend Christmas with, share memes with, play games with, talk about nonsense with deep into the night, explore emotions and share thoughts with. And empty my balls into on occasion.

  31. A simple explanation of a man’s needs “ loyalty , trust , respect , appreciation , affection , emotional support “

  33. I’ll name everything I want in a life partner. Someone whose calm and collected, doesnt freak out over small things. Someone who understands who I am and is independent with that (I’m a Firefighter and am starting my own business so I’m working alot). Someone who loves sex and is explorative with sex. Been in a dead bedroom relationship and anyone who says that a couple can work if one wants sex and the other doesnt, is lying. Someone who can help with household chores. I’m not too old fashioned to think a woman should just cook and clean, I do that alot in my relationship but I like a girl who can help out. And personally for me a girl who loves dogs. I love dogs and will always have a few so a girl who loves them is huge (yes before anyone says I’m a firefighter with dogs I’m currently in an LTR, with a girl who I live with so she takes care of the dogs as well, shes also a vet tech).

  34. Not a 32 year old lady with no commitment in any relationships she has had. Its a massive red flag to most people.

  36. Peace and contentment. We really don’t require much. I speak for Every man when I say that all we need is food, blowjobs and love and we will die for you. That’s it!

  37. Loyalty. A supported helpmeet. A cheerleader for him. Believe in him. Honor him. Defend him. Respect him above all others. Be a sincere lady in public. Be his unrestrained hooker in private in the bedroom.
    For this men have conquered countries to give to his woman.

  40. A woman who adores me, that wants my protection and love, who listens to what I have to say and shows regular affection.

  41. What I am looking for. TRIGGER WARNING I like traditional women.

    Submissive. Not to say that she isn’t my equal. Just trust me to lead and make decisions.

    Humbleness. Because so many women nowadays are so prideful and narcissistic that they break the people they claim to love. Apologize when it’s warranted. Don’t be a condensing bitch.

    Loyalty. Because many people aren’t. Be at my corner. Don’t give another man the time of day.

    Love. Because the world doesn’t give that to men. I’m not talking about the toxic shit either. I’m talking hugs when I come home. Doing for each other even when we are upset or fighting. That’s love. Reciprocate the energy I put in.

    Sexy. Yeah I said it. I like a woman who maintains herself. Confident enough to wear those gorgeous leather leggings or that sexy dress on date night. Willing to put in some effort in her appearance. Yes that includes working out. You dont need to be a super model just don’t get lazy because you have a partner now.

    Respect. Stop wasting your time and energy gaslighting and pressing my buttons. Use it instead to lift me up and encourage me. Don’t undermine me. Don’t go behind my back.

    Don’t withhold sex. Says it’s self. I’d even add don’t be afraid to explore new things.

  42. Affection first and foremost.

    But also stability, love, trust, shared special moments, and feeling like I have a teammate in life.

  45. I would like to have someone text me sometimes. Maybe some memes or jokes, or about plans for the weekend, or what’s for dinner, or sexy things. It would be nice to not feel alone all day.

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