So recently I’ve graduated high school and started going to my local community college to save some money, and in one of my classes is my old friend and high school crush, for the sake of the post I’ll call her K. Anyways, we immediately hit it off in the class and hung out after class a few times. For a little context I told her I liked her in my freshman year (I was 16 then, 18 now, we hadn’t spoken or seen each other really in about three years). Last night however I came over to her house and we just laughed and talked for a while and I can feel myself sort of falling for her again, but I don’t want to have a repeat, should I try and go for it, or no? She’s a bit of a natural flirt so sometimes it’s hard to tell but I feel like every-time we get together it’s just different than with anyone else
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A few questions might help you get clear on what a good course of action might be— 🙂
You’ve described her in a few different ways—‘fell in love’, ‘old friend’, ‘high school crush’. If you’re honest with yourself, do you only want to spend time with her if it’s leading to you two being together as a couple? If she said she wasn’t interested, would you still be interested in friendship or would you want to stop getting to know her?
If you really feel you’d be ok with either option, then what can it hurt to keep getting to know her and see where it goes? If you give it a little time, you might be able to get a sense of what she wants without doing the vulnerable thing of actually coming out and asking. If you’d be happy to have her as a friend, you’ll be closer to her whether or not you end up ‘together’!
If you’re only interested in spending time with her because you hope it’s leading to something more, it would be more honest, and likely less hurtful to you both, to communicate that sooner rather than later. Getting ‘friend zoned’ sucks if you want a relationship or something more. Getting ‘relationship zoned’ sucks if all you want is friendship.
I hope that’s helpful, and good luck! :):)