So I have had this problem for years where I feel super uncomfortable looking people in the eyes. This only happens with people I’m not already comfortable with. Other than that close friends and family I have no problem doing it. I don’t this its ASD as some people have said. I can conversate with people but with no problem but looking people in the eyes for me feels intimate.
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I do this sort of halfway. When someone else is speaking, I look them in the eyes. But when I’m speaking, I don’t–I think not having to do this helps me focus my thoughts.
Maybe you could try this–look when speaking, and away when not. Perhaps that could ease you into this. People seem fine with this when I do it.
You can look at their shoulder, forehead or just a little sideways if looking dead on the eyes seems daunting at first