Hello there
My friend (25F) and I (25M) hooked up casually once, but we both feel a bit more than that for each other. We both agreed to be there for each other no matter what, and it turns out there’s a person(John) from the past she’s stuck on for some time and wants to text him to see how John feels about her. She asked me how I felt about her sending the text message, and I said I was totally fine with her texting and figuring out what’s the situation between them; I selflessly noted that no matter what, I’ll be here for her if John said yes ill be her friend but if he says no ill be more than friends with her. She said she was conflicted about messaging John because of me. Is what I did in the best interest of her and me? I am scared of how John will respond to it because, if I am being honest, I want John to say no so that I can be with her, but I don’t know what to do.
**Background:** She was in a relationship with someone who was not John when she moved to my city. Still, they broke up due to Long distance relationship issues. John was before this relationship.
2 comments
IMO you should have voiced out your concern or may voice it out even now if you have time. If you seriously feel for her and she does the same way for you then this may help her move on from John Finally and have a stable relationship again
You need to be bold enough with the person you love and put this guy out of the equation. It’s called shooting your shot. Being ‘selfless’ in this situation just puts you in misery and serves no purpose as it shows them that they aren’t incredibly important to you enough to make you move mountains for them. If it doesn’t work out then that’s ok still be her friend but show her she is worth it