My boyfriend is nice sometimes but he also criticizes my body. He put me on a diet but I haven’t lost any weight. He doesn’t like my nipples or labia either. It’s really annoying because he’ll say stuff when I’m just laying down or changing my clothes.

Lately I can’t orgasm. Sometimes it’ll happen if the lights are off but we don’t do that often. I just think about how unattractive I am. He’s made fun of my orgasm face/noises. So I’m not too comfortable. He asked me why I can’t do it anymore and accused me of cheating on him. I told him that the stuff he says sometimes are in my head and it makes me feel ugly. He said they were just jokes and if I’m sensitive enough to take it seriously, it’s my fault. I just miss having fun.

49 comments

  7. Insecurity loves company, stay with this guy and he will slowly destroy every bit of you.

  8. The lowest bar is to be a decent human being to strangers. Your boyfriend can’t even do that to you. There’s someone out there that is going to love you AND your body. Distance yourself from this guy.

  11. You deserve better. Is he like a fuckin greek god or something? Because if a man has the nerve to tear apart your body like that they better be perfect. But tbh guys who look like that would never be insecure enough to treat a woman this way. Because thats what this is, his own insecurities he’s projecting onto you. He probably feels shitty about himself and realizes you’re to good for him so he tries to destroy your confidence so you’ll never leave. I had an ex do the same to me and in the end he said basically exactly that and that he never thought I was ugly. It didn’t change anything though, I’ll never look at myself the same way I did before he said all of those things to me. Run. Run far away and don’t look back at his sorry ass.

  13. yeah thats emotional abuse… you should get out before it becomes physical.

  14. If you’re naked and your boyfriend thinks your genitals aren’t attractive, then he doesn’t love you. Period.

  17. Oh, no no no… If this is the person you were supposed to be with, you wouldn’t have to change a single f*cking thing about yourself for him to love you totally and completely.

  19. He deserves a new title, EX-BOYFRIEND!. There is no salvaging this. He has done too much damage. This is a him issue not a you issue. You deserve better.!

  20. I wonder if he’s mr perfect?
    A partner should make you feel like the most attractive person in the world and they should love and adore you warts and all! No person has any right in putting a grown person on a diet!!! He’s knocking your self esteem and that is not a healthy relationship at all.

  21. Tell him to fuck off. I normally like to have a deep chat about people amd their personalities but this guy is obviously a flat out tool. Put him in the bin and find someone better, It won’t be hard

  22. He really should be your *ex* boyfriend at this point. You need a partner not a parent.

  24. > He put me on a diet

    Girl what? This man is not your doctor or your parent. It is so gross and controlling of him to “put” you on a diet.

    This dude is an abuser. He’s hitting like every bingo space for it. The fact that you “miss having fun” should tell you everything you need to know. Get out of there and find someone who respects you.

  26. this is screaming red flags, leave him girl while you still can…. you’ll find man who is gonna love you for who you are and make you feel beautiful everyday!!!! know your worth, don’t settle.

  27. He is a ashole. Please leave him he is the main reason of your insecurities. He is so immature for a relationship. He doesn’t care for your emotions. I hope you break up with him. Don’t accuse yourself for his bullshit. I bet you are beautiful.

  28. Sometimes it can be really tough to believe that someone else out there will want you, particularly when you feel insecure about your appearance due to comments made by your current partner.

    Please believe me when I say that there are so many people out there who, given the chance, will love your nipples/ labia/ body shape/ face. You do not need to waste anymore time with someone who is frankly abusive towards you and gaslights you when you express your feelings about it.

    We all only get one life, don’t waste yours on this idiot.

  29. Your boyfriend sounds immature. He’s probably the type of guy that expects every women to look like a pornstar. Leave him and find someone who doesn’t judge you and your body.

  31. Leave this dude. Its a deliberate ploy to keep you down and thinking he’s the best you can do, because he knows he himself is not worthy of your little pinkies nail tip, let alone your entire person. So he keeps you down trodden and insecure to keep you.

    YOU. CAN. DO. BETTER!

    And he knows it.

    DUMP HIM!

  33. Dump him but before you do treat him the same way. I’m sure he has flaws and isn’t perfect. People like him are insecure and tear others down to feel better.

  34. I don’t know if you realise this, but he is abusing you. It’s hard to describe but he is putting you down so you won’t be able to leave.

    No decent human being would treat you like this.

    You probably wouldn’t be happy if your friend was being treated like this.

    Leave and then get some care to help you recover.

  35. Some people kiss a frog and they turn into a prince. Other kiss a prince and turn them into a frog. You’re not a frog. My guess is this get worse as time passes.

  36. Ouch! Most important thing in life is to be comfortable with yourself.

    1. Get rid of your BF, he isn’t respecting that he is hurting/harming you and he isn’t listening.

    2. Determine what you think, how you feel about yourself and if you aren’t satisfied, do something about it until you are!

    3. Once you are comfortable and happy with yourself find some ones who can appreciate you for who you are.

    But remember, if you don’t then don’t expect others to either!

  38. Have you considered dating someone that doesn’t shit all over you all the time? Seriously, you’d be better off single than how you currently are.

  39. I just divorced the man that made me feel bad about myself. I have smaller breasts and pointy nipples and he constantly had negative remarks to say about them. So much so, that I couldn’t stand to see myself topless. I thought my chest was disgusting. Jokes, comments, critiques… As if I didn’t know I was small chested. I divorced him (not due to that) and the guy I am dating now loves my body. He compliments me all the time. I feel happy and free to walk around him naked, because I know he loves what I look like.

    I actually love my boobs now! I think they nice and perky. Get away from that toxic man so you can love yourself too!

  42. He wants to make you feel small and ugly so that you never leave him. His criticisms of your beautiful body keep you in check and under his control. This is very abusive.

    You deserve a real kind of love that is complimentary, supportive and protective. I hope that you can be strong enough to walk away from this relationship and leave yourself open to one that is more healthy.

  43. As a joke, tell him his penis looks like an gummy worm and it’s not doing it for you anymore.

    He is trash. Throw him away.

    This guy and other people like him, frustate the absolute shit out of me… the nerve of some people, idgf about our species survival anymore.

  44. This guy is emotionally and mentally abusing you .. he put you on a diet ?! Like wtf …he’s an absolute pos that doesn’t deserve you dump him also people that usually accuse the other person of cheating are often doing it to deflect their own cheating lose the dead weight which is him and go have fun 🙂 seriously why are you with someone that treats you like this ? .. “ he’s nice sometimes “ what a catch …

  45. The problem the internet brings to abusive people is that you can share your story anonymously and get some feedback. In the past, that was really hard because you would have to find some sort of support group (how do you even find one if you are not entirely sure you need one?) or trust your friends who might find themselves in similar situations to you, and therefore, give you a sense that it was normal.

    That being said, everything you’ve shared is completely shitty. Imagine if your best friend came and told you their bf beats the shit out of them daily. Almost that bad.

    Please, do yourself a favor and end that relationship. People like that won’t learn to respect others unless they are taught the hard way.

  46. So you want to stay with a man who sucks the joy out of your life? He’s making you hate yourself and has already destroyed your self esteem. Sounds like he wants to trap you into never leaving him so he can keep destroying you so you’ll have no choice to stay.

    GET THE FUCK OUT!

  47. Tell him he cant make u orgasm, thats on him. He ruined sex for you. Get a guy who is nice all the time, not just selectively or only in front of others. All of what he said would ruin sex for me personally, and it seems it did for you too. He sounds insecure and has to put you down, hes testing to see how much you will put up with. stop being nice for his sake because hes clearly not trying to spare your feelings. Hes also gaslighting you by saying “its just a joke” “youre too sensitive”, thats the time he needed to apologize and he turned it around on you. I hope you see your worth

  48. Start insulting his dick size and how it looks, when he gets angry tell him it’s a joke, that he can’t take a joke. I guarantee he won’t be happy. Jokes aside, he is making jokes at your expensive, none of these are funny and he is being a serious dick.

    Find someone who appreciates how you look, who you are and not trying to fix you and put you on a diet (unless it is medically or health wise necessary, even then this guys is not actually being supportive in any way).

  49. Your partner should make you feel safe and secure. If this is affecting intimacy, it’s a big problem. I’m sure he wouldn’t like it if you talked about him the way he talks about you.

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