Long story short I (24F) am getting married in 10 months. My (24F) bridesmaid, we’ll call her P, and I have been friends for a little over a year. We had a rocky beginning but quickly worked things out and have grown close over the past year. Except for this.
On NYE my fiancés parents always throw a party. My fiancé and I are utilizing it this year to celebrate our engagement. We got engaged in October of this year. Most of his groomsmen and most of my bridesmaids will be there. It will just be bridesmaids and their husbands/long term partners and same for the groomsmen. So groomsmen + spouses/long term partners.
I told all my bridesmaids about this party about a month ago and all were happy and excited.
This past weekend my bridesmaid P met a guy who is 15 years older than us and slept with him. She wants to invite him to the party and I politely told her no, as it is my in-laws house and she has only just met this guy.
She is very upset that he cannot come and is stating that if he won’t be there then neither will she. She even told one of my other bridesmaids that I will just get over it, if she (P) does not come. My bridesmaid was telling her that this is my ENGAGEMENT party and that everyone in the wedding party should be there to support but P does not care and insists that unless her fuck buddy is able to come, she will not be attending either.
I am incredibly upset about this because this is my engagement party, and she is blatantly choosing her one night stand over me. I plan to have a conversation with her about this stating my feelings , but I honestly would just prefer to end the friendship and kick her out of my wedding. I am worried that if I let her stay in the party she will be incapable of putting me first on a day that means the most to me. Advice?
2 comments
P is somehow making this all about her. It’s possible that she’d feel embarrassed being the only one without a partner, but you have a right to choose who comes to celebrate your engagement.
She should want to celebrate you whether she has a partner there or not, and understand why you wouldn’t want a stranger there.
Let her know that you feel hurt that she’s choosing this guy over you and see what she says.
You’ve only known her a year, and she is already making demands to a party she is invited to? I don’t care if it’s just a backyard BBQ, if she is invited and told the expectations, she should respect the invitations instructions, or politely decline. She never has the right to make demands.
Cut her and her narcissistic drama