TLDR: Feeling like I’ve lost my love for my partner and don’t know wether it’s cause I’m embarrassed of hanging out them them now because of the way she hugs and talks to all her friends about loving them passionately. I’m happy when I’m with them but I don’t feel like im in love anymore.
I’ll keep it brief here, I’ve only been in this relationship for over 2 months now and it’s been my partners first ever real relationship. It’s only been 2 months but I’ve been starting to be thinking and get confused at my own feelings and what I should to help this or should I just end it. We meet at the start of school and started dating a few months back, they are super considerate and very understanding but I’ve been like I haven’t been making an effort to text as much or hang out with them as much as they want me to. My partner openly admits she struggles with validation and overthinking, she broke down on my shoulder like two weeks in saying how she doesn’t think I love her and when I’m busy with school activities that I’m ignoring her. She’s trying to get better and she is a awesome person for doing that but I just feel like the texts I’m sending are empty and I’ve fallen out of love. I’m happy with them but I don’t feel like I love them, I don’t text them as much as they want me too and don’t do pda like they want me to (I don’t like hugged by them in school or other public settings idk why, am I embarrassed with them I don’t know) I’m trying to consider breaking things off but I honestly don’t know if this is a passing feeling, my parents love her and I’d feel like a terrible person breaking up with them after they’ve said they don’t know what they’d do without me.
Few things to add:
– I did not know they were starting to think about transitioning (FTM) when dating so they constantly talk about how they’d be better was a guy, it’s not a problem that they are trans but I did not get into this relationship expecting that
-as mentioned before it seems like im the only thing holding together emotionally and I feel like im not there for them and not right for her and her level of validation. I don’t have enough free time and when I don’t she says that I makes her feel bad and I feel terrible
Please help im being drained by this and my own thoughts
3 comments
Im sorry but if you’re only two months in and already dealing with this much doubt, it’s not going to work in the long run. It seems like your partner needs to spend a lot of time in therapy before they’re ready for a relationship.
It’s OK to not want to be in a relationship with someone who wants to transition or remain attracted to them. That’s not discrimination.
how old are you? 2 months is not a long time. you may like her, but i don’t think that’s enough time to fall in and out of love. i would call that infatuation. it seems clear that you don’t like her romantically and that’s okay. she will move on.