I feel like my boyfriend doesn’t consider my feelings

I feel like my boyfriend doesn’t consider my feelings

I (26f) have been with my bf (27m) for 3 and a half years. During this time we’ve been through a lot together, from being separated from covid for half a year to surgeries. I love him immensely, he’s my best friend, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him.

The problem is, I feel like he can be self centred and he doesn’t always consider my feelings. We grew up in different countries with different cultures (him India, and I in Canada), which is probably a contributing factor, but I’m not sure if I’m over reacting or being too sensitive when I get upset over things.

As we grew up with different financial backgrounds (his parents have very good paying jobs), he did not have any student loans and he also entered the workforce before me and has a higher paying job (around 10k more a year). With these factors, he is further ahead financially and would like to buy a house. We have talked about getting married within the next 3-5 years but he would like to invest in real estate right now. We’ve talked about this and I explained that I won’t be ready to buy a house for another year or two because of our different financial circumstances. He wants to buy a house without me, as he insists if we are buying together everything should be 50/50. The same is discussed when we look at costs for a wedding, as he believes that he shouldn’t have to spend all his savings because I don’t have the difference in money available. I find this really hurtful, and like I have less value because I’m not wealthy. My financial status and background was disclosed in the early stages of our relationship, so it shouldn’t be a surprise.

This continues over in things like him wanting to go on vacation, and when I don’t have the money, deciding to go by himself. It would be different if we sat down and talked about it, but I feel like his attitude is very much “well I didn’t get to do anything fun for my birthday last year, so I want to do something this year, I’m sorry you can’t afford the tickets but I want to do something fun”. So he’s booked a trip without me leaving Christmas night.

Am I being overly sensitive? I feel like as he grew up wealthy and as an only child he became accustomed to getting what he wants, when he wants it. I can’t help feeling like I’m being needy or overly sensitive at the same time. I grew up in a household where my parents balanced each other financially, so the idea of everything being an even split seems very transactional. All household bills we split evenly despite the difference in financial status.

TL;DR!

I feel like my boyfriend doesn’t consider my feelings, as he often focuses on his own wants (vacations, buying a house) and wanting to make major life moves without me (due to my lack of financial ability) without considering how that makes me feel.