Ps: I know a lot of ppl think demisexuality is bullshit but it’s just a label that perfectly describes me: I just feel sexual attraction for people I have a strong bond with.
My friends started having their first kisses at 12/13, I thought it didn’t make sense to kiss someone I didn’t like, but for me it was just me being childish. And it was 100% ok, my friends have always supported me.
The time passed and I am now 17 years old. NO experience whatsoever. Never kissed anyone, never got intimate with any boy, never everything. But I do have romantic feelings, more specifically, 2 boys on the last 4 years, and I was so scared about being inexperienced, not knowing how to flirt, how to show interest that I gave up on both of them.
I am just scared I will be always like that and be alone because I just DO NOT HAVE ANY EXPERIENCE. Before, during, and after getting sexual. Every step feels impossible…
2 comments
17 is young you shouldn’t worry, I had my first kiss at 20 and I am now with the love of my life. But if you really want to just express feelings to one of the boys, better to not regret, ask one out or ask another friend of yours to see if they like you.
Hey, I’m built the same way, and though I did date two people in high school, I didn’t ever consider sex with them. It wasn’t until I got to know my boyfriend of three years as a college freshman that I really understood what attraction felt like. I’m much happier I waited until it felt right to me.
My boyfriend also had never dated before me— he attended an all-boy private school—, and I didn’t think anything of his inexperience. He wasn’t a very good kisser when we started, but we got to know each other that way too. There’s learning to be done with every romantic and sexual partner, and anyone worth their salt is going to be happy to catch you up on what you haven’t experienced yet.
I also think it’s worth doing research of your own. I read a lot about sex because I find it interesting and also because I want to please my partner. It can be hard to find really useful information, but I think it’s worth the effort.
Anyway, there’s no good reason to be embarrassed of how you experience sexuality or your lack of experience, especially when you’re so young. Plenty of time for firsts in the future!