I (24F) and Amy closest female friends, nothing is really off limits about our sex life. We talk about everything. Not necessarily in an exploitative way, but I can understand why people may feel it is a bit exploitative.
Honestly, conversations about sex started when we were younger as a way to figure out what was normal vs not normal. My best friend had more access to sex health care (grew up in a very conservative family in regards to sexuality), and would always make sure that if I had questions she would ask them to the nurses.
Now as an adult, my friends and I will talk about our sex lives, not super in detail, but recently, my other friend (who is male) was in the room while we were talking about sex and after he was like girls really don’t spare any details huh.
I never thought of this. I’ve had drunk girls in bar washrooms tell me about their sex life. I didn’t realize it was so odd to men. He also was a bit weirded out that we were willing to help each other with things like waxing or checking for body hair.
How in depth do guys talk about sex?
29 comments
Honestly? No. I’m not sure how it matches how girls talk, but I know that my previous girlfriends shared a lot more than I did. According to them they got all the way down to details while me and the guys’ ‘locker room talk’ consists of “did you do it?” followed by a raised eyebrow or grin and “ayyyyyy”
Not me. Me and my guy friends dont mention it. Whatever i do with someone sexually stays private. That way it helps the other person to open up without fear of it being broadcast to my friends.
In my various groups over the years, we usually knew who hooked up with who but that was it. No real details.
No, not nearly as much. Some guy groups do but I think it’s more rare.
My hypothesis is that the primary cause is the chance of “ruining a girl’s reputation”. A lot of women I’ve been with really don’t want to be talked about in that way. I’ve been asked to be discrete a few times. The lady in the streets, naughty between the sheets type.
In hindsight it’s probably restrictive and makes sex less good for women because of the lack of information exchange.
Like others on here the conversations I’ve had are more often “Got laid last night” “Nice” maybe a few conversations have some real detail but they are few and far between.
Not really. If there is a legit question or something I think would help someone, I don’t have a problem with it. For the most part though, I keep things private.
With my one best friend, yes. I am pretty open. I don’t give him a play by play, but we do share what worked and what didn’t.
Not really. Usually if it’s about a random girl in a hook up yeah we talk in a sense of bragging and a bit superficially. But if it’s about a wife, someone we care, kinda seems that talking about it is too intrusive and too imaginative to put on other guys mind
As a guy, I’ve gotten into way more detail with my female friends than I have my male friends. I’m a pretty open book, and don’t mind talking about it, but guys don’t really want details. Have heard from my wife how detailed her and her girl friends get.
Don’t talk about it with anyone but my partner, I personally find it disrespectful and gross the way some guys talk about their “escapades” Like bro I dont care, dont want to know.
I’ve talked about past sexual experiences of women who are completely unknown to the friends I’m telling, but I’d never share about a current relationship or past that they might know.
Here is a guys version of sex talk.
Friend 1 : “I got a blowjob last night”
Friend 2 : “nice!”
End of conversation.
Not really in detail. And I’d say that’s simply out of respect for my partner. She may not want me sharing those details with my friends.
If I wanted to share something in particular with them I’d ask her first – and I know she’d say no.
Also worth noting that I’m very open about sex, and enjoy talking about sex with my friends. I think it’s healthy to have open discussions. Just not intimate details that someone else may not want public. If I’m sharing something personal it’s about myself, not others.
I work as a skilled tradesmen, in a very male dominated field. Always have. Once in a blue moon you hear about a serial cheater, but honestly, I’ve never had any of those conversations with other men I know very well
Fuck no. Sorry to be blunt, but most guys don’t at all.
You’d be surprised how many guys feel that if you’re talking about a current partner, they see is as a betrayal of trust.
My friend group comes from generally conservative backgrounds, and the only reason we know that, is because as we’ve had bachelor parties as each of us have gotten married, the one getting married gets the jitters and asks for advice on first time sex. That is the only time sex comes up in my friend group other than inappropriate jokes (that’s what she said, etc.)
My friends and I avoid it like the plague
I’ve always worked in mostly female dominated jobs and I was shocked when I first learned how much females openly share about their sex lives. In my experience, guys share too, but generally not nearly in as much detail. I only talk about sex with my partner to my best friend, and she’s aware of it. He’s like the brother I never had, so I don’t see anything wrong with it. If guys don’t talk to other guys about it, we’ve got no basis for comparison except what we see in porn- and that’s definitely not how women should want us setting expectations.
I wouldn’t think of going into detail about my partner’s and my sex life. She wouldn’t be ok with me giving out her social security or phone number without permission. Why would I divulge private intimate details with my friends some of whom she doesn’t particularly like? I’m honestly kinda bothered by this question because I have always operated with this standard out of respect to my partners and now I wonder if I wasn’t afforded the same courtesy.
Nope me and the boys don’t discuss our sex lives in any detail. I’ve never met any men who do. This seems to be very much a thing women do
IME, straight guys when they’re younger may with hookups and dating, but most guys will clam up by the time they’re married. Gay guys definitely DO.
Not really, I have found most men do not feel comfortable letting their friends know intimate details about their partner. For both themselves but also their partner’s sake.
Guys generally would see it as a betrayal of trust.
Women view it far less seriously.
Nope. We don’t talk about it at all.
No, we don’t.
45M. The most I’ve ever talked about sex with my male friends is mentioning that I’ve had it. Details, definitely not.
Man here and nope! Betrayal of trust imo.
No. Guys are generally pretty vague. But the stuff I’ve heard women say is usually pretty….detailed.
Men don’t tend to talk about people in general. Especially someone they care about. The more they care about someone the less likely they will mention them. You can know a guy that you’ve worked with for years and have no clue they’re happily married with kids.
No. This was one of the things that shocked me most about my (almost exclusively) female friend circle in college. Sex was a regular and highly explicit topic of conversation in a way I NEVER experienced with other men. The deepest it ever got with other men was a confirmation that they did, in deed, have sex with a particular woman. Then I’d walk into a conversation among women like, “I mean, yeah, but if you go deep enough you don’t have to taste anything.”
Night and day difference.