I have always been a lonely guy. I can’t help being the one in the back, listening instead of talking, always the outsider in any group. I wish I did not listen to this side of my soul so much, but I cannot be better then this. In a few days there’s going to be a Christmas party at my office and I am making up excuses not to go. I can’t face this kind of social occasion with a hundred people drinking, dancing and socializing. I just can’t. And what I hate most of all is the questions they will ask me about me not being there. I just wish no one would even notice, but it won’t happen. Please send suggestions.
3 comments
Dude. Go and observe. Be an anthropologist. Examine how people interact, the glad-handing, the hearty handshakes, the overly enthusiastic hugs, and the words exchanged. If you run from this to protect yourself, you’ll miss a good opportunity to push yourself forward even if it ends up a bust. Push through your discomfort.
And if people ask why you’re not being social, you can say you’re not normally social but you’re trying. The worst thing for being non-social is trying to hide it. You probably expend tons of energy trying to manage it. That’s a waste of energy. I’ve been where you are. The odd one in the back and I hated it. I at least wanted the option to be social. Getting out of it took directed effort.
So just go. Go and have a terrible time then go home and pat yourself in the back for fighting through your anxiety and putting yourself out there.
social skills can be learned. the knowledge is out there, you gotten the first step. just know, there’s a lot.
Ur not on ur own. I find it hard as well mainly because I am quite quiet because I don’t know what to say and I can’t think before I speak which puts people off. But IDK maybe blend in and try and talk about what is going on now in this world like world cup?