hi all,for context my boyfriend broke up a year ago, then got back together a few months ago. when we first started having sex after we got back together he would last a long time. like 15-20 minutes. recently we’ve both noticed he can only last a few minutes and can’t hold it in anymore, and cums pretty early (and against his will lol) and before I have the chance to finish. we both don’t know what’s causing it and he said something along the lines of maybe it’s our bodies communicating with each other. It was sorta like this in our previous relationship, maybe even worse now. Any ideas on why this is happening???
5 comments
Is your concern that he is finishing without you and that is where it stops so sex is feeling one sided?
Depending on how often you are having sex you could ask him to “pregame” and orgasm prior to sex, or you can make that as a part of foreplay where you get him to orgasm once before penetration and after a moment you can then work towards longer penetration.
You could also look into a cock ring they can make people last longer depending on person and toy.
Because sex feels good
I would cum in 2 minutes if that was acceptable
But no, I have to fight against my body and how amazing it feels and make myself get past that “wow this feels amazing” feeling that lasts about 2-3 minutes for me
After that I can go forever and in fact it’s harder to orgasm the longer I go.
So yea. Your pussy feels good. Makes him orgasm. That’s the answer.
Something is off.
It’s not your bodies doing anything.
It’s psychological.
Possibly, he’s stopped trying as hard. Stopped using something that he used to. Anesthetic sprays/creams/chemicals or supplements that helped delay his ejaculation. Some medications cause anorgasmia or delay ejaculation. Perhaps, he stopped taking a medication?
Maybe, he’s just that into you.
The typical therapies or techniques for premature ejaculation should still work. Start applying some and experiment with the best ways to delay his orgasm. Perhaps he can work on getting you off two or five times before penis-in-vagina sex..?
Given he lasted longer earlier, it’s probably something psychological. Could be in his work or school life or something in your relationship causing him stress and leading him to finish early. Also it’s a really shitty self fulfilling issue once it’s happened once or twice it’s hard to get out of your own head.
Depending how long his refractory period is — maybe try getting him off with oral, etc during foreplay and then maybe he pleasures you or you just keep making out till he’s ready again.
I personally get super excited for the first couple minutes of sex but if I can hold out until that passes it gets easier to last for longer. I find it helps if we are talking/joking around or I’m just more vocal during those first few minutes or we go for a couple min and then switch up to something else briefly before going back to piv.
Difference in your natural lube?
Try a good silicone based lube like Exxtreme Glide Silicone, Pjur Backdoor, Uberlube… and see if it changes his staying power just as it changed mine.
Have fun!