I (29M) have been together with my partner (29F) for the last 5 years. I had a glimpse of my partner’s chat with her best male work-budddy(34M). He is also engaged and about to be married, his partner is giving him a hard time, they have lunch breaks together and from the chat he seemed to be overly protective of her
The chat was screenshoted by her and took place right after an argument I had with her about going outside with her friends all the time.
The conversation was:
– Can I ask you something completely stupid?
– Yes
– If we had met in the past while single, would you have wanted me?
– Yeah – delete these text after because they might be seen the wrong way if read
– Ofc
– Yeah, but sure you are a nice and attractive person, I would have dated you, that’s my thoughts basically, lol
– Lol, thanks
The same guy, dropped my partner at the closest bus stop, at 3am after the company’s Christmas party despite his bus stop being miles away and the next bus was 20mins later. I managed to catch them up running from the previous stop, they were hugging (she explained it to me the day after as a goodbye hug)
I really love her, but I cannot understand why this is happening.
Tldr: I think my fiance is trying to sideways date and trace if she can get together with her work colleague.
6 comments
Wtf is this shit? Of COURSE THAT’S FLIRTING.
Man, you know WTF is up.
Those texts are feelers.
They are feeling one another out to see where this can go.
These aren’t innocent texts, this is the lead in to the next step.
Your intuition is telling you and you need to follow your gut on this one.
They are out til 3:00 AM , they are texting each other asking if they would date each other.
Hugging one another, most coworkers don’t do that shit in this day and age.
Text the guy yourself and say “I’m going to drop her off at your place because she needs a place to stay , and apparently you two are extremely close. I’m also going to send your GF the texts you have sent her”.
Watch how fast that dude shits his pants and wants nothing more to do with your GF.
Don’t let these people manipulate you mentally, cause that’s what’s happening.
They are going to fuck your mind up , with thoughts and shit, then gaslight you as if you are in the wrong.
You need to talk to your fiancé.
She and her coworker seem good friends and obviously find each other attractive. Doesn’t mean anything sinister, but you need to voice your concern to her.
Seems there are some trust issues there that need to be clarified and resolved.
I don’t think it’s really flirting as much as being nice. Maybe the coworker is more interested in her than she is in him. Maybe she wanted him to feel better when he was down. I’m curious to know how you found her text message. Was it accidental? If not, then paranoia has gotten to you and that’s definitely not a path you want to go down.
Bro if you were asking a girl “would you date me?” what would be your intention? To make it clear that you have an option. Your gf is looking for options right now, which means she doesnt take what she has with you seriously. I’d just dump her. You can literally get a new girl tomorrow
Sorry but, with the 3 am hugging combined with that text exchange tells me the two of them are in or heading into an emotional affair. Not certain if its turned physical.
Let her know she has weakened the trust within your relationship. Not sure how you wish to proceed, but these circumstances would be cause to rethink your engagement.