Hey,
this is my last post here before I delete myself. I spend some time here and I notice some patterns. I dont have many skills in my life expect abstracting therefore I will boil lots of topics down for you.This post is not to hate and shame anybody but really help!
Take responsibility for yourself and your action!
**Stop hiding:**
I see a lot of posts like: How do I tell her/him that I have feelings ? Did I hurt her/him feelings ? How do I ask her/him for date.
The answer is simple, by asking them, thats it. Direct communication. This what if and so on. If I liked someone I just told her. Hey you caught my attention and I like you, would like to go on a date. When I read the posts in the group here, I must sound like a complete maniac. I know I sound like a boomer and boomers did the same stuff but they had no choice you couldnt hide behind a screen or your phone or something elese. You either did or you had nothing and them saying that back than we all had “balls” wont help because they didnt had they technologie and most of them would be stucked as you. Therefore stopp hiding and go for it.
**Take responsibility:**
Something I see a lot younger people is that the dont take any responsibility for their words/action. Example: People explaining me that shoes over 80 bucks are a waste of money and I dont know how keep my finances in check. Week later you seem them with 350$ yeezes when you confront them. They pretend like they never said it everything is fine. This gaslighting behavior is dirving me nuts. I was young once too (Im 30 now) and I was naive and sometimes cocky and thats absolute fine but take reponsibility for it. If you fuck up, say it. They same goes with dating I see so often that people just try to impress people by just saying what they want to hear. You show zero character with it. I dont role with everybodys opinion. I even disagree often with my best friend and thats fine. Its just a disagrement, we are still friends. Because I stay my ground and have no problem admitting a mistake, I get nothing but respect. When people ask my something they knew they get an honest opinion which has really weight.
**Being social is a skill:**
Its like a sport some people a extremely gifted and others need forever and thats fine. My friend can deadlift 180kg (400lbs) at his first deadlift session. Me after 2 years of specific training managed 160kg. I will never reach him but thats fine I still made big progress. The same goes with being social. You will fail and thats fine. You need reps and reps and reps. Asking someone out on a date once a year wont help you at all. Its like going to the gym once a year. You need constant training, talk to strangers, join a club. They are millions of ways to improve it and do it online! You will always hide yourself at some point. Just easy honest direct communication.
**Be humble:**
The expectation for the partner are insane today. When I hear what my friends (male and female) expect from their relationship is just plain pathetic. Did you ever looked in the mirror asked yourself what do you have to offer ? All these popular podcasts rearding this topic as sexiest towards man and women and make absolute no sense. It feels like people forcing themselves into this ideal relationship goals and not working together reaching them. So many people are a mix of arrogance and anxiety. Telling that the partner should have XYZ but at the same time they are to scared to ask any girl/men out and have close to nothing to offer. A whole generation is getting brainwashed by this social media stars. Its sad and I hope you find the trurth in it.
You are not perfect and thats fine, stop chasing your fanatsy goals and start working on yourself. Dont watch this perfect tik tok stars or this rich motivational videos they are all trash and full of shit.
Bonus: Stop judging and assuming! You cant have a normal convo today without hearing. I bet you are this and that…. Stop
Good luck and keep it real