My mental health has been terrible and it makes me so insufferable and almost abusive to my friends and family. Smallest things will make me short circuit and go off. Either I will end up apologizing if I think I was wrong and know I overrracted but usually they still are upset about it. If i don’t think I am wrong I often just completely block them on everything and it leads to be burning bridges very quickly.
I have been struggling so much with anger too that my response is often yelling and worse cases hitting and threatening. I feel like I literally can’t help it.
I feel constantly aggravated by everyone’s presence even if I love them. And when I am talking to them I am often rude and snappy, even if I don’t mean to.
I also have belive I might have borderline personality disorder (my counselor does too) but I have not been diagnosed yet.
What do I do. I feel like I’m miserable I am making everyone else miserable too. I feel like I’m going to be left with no one left in my life. I often convince myself that I am okay with being isolated and tell myself everyday I don’t nobody and I think it makes me so willing to lose others even if I love them. However I feel like pushing myself further into isolation is making it worse and my actions eat me up with guilt. I want to be a better person.
Tl;dr: I am a short circuit person who has a idgaf attitude. I don’t want to hurt people anymore but don’t know how to be better.
1 comment
you can start by doing something very simple in theory but harder in practice, remind yourself to think about what you say and how you would interact with people, in fear of being off putting you put some stress on yourself but you just have to remember to keep it easygoing