My boyfriend( we’ll call him A) of 6 months was the in the beggining of out relationship. He didn’t have any problem with me having male friends, but now everything changed. I used to have a male friend C and we got along very well. We were nothing more than friends and A was ok with us being friends. A few days ago he messaged me saying that I should cut any contact and block C. When I asked why he started saying that I like C and that’s why I don’t want to block him. After some more arguing I eventualy blocked C and cut any contact with him. He also didn’t like my oldest friend who I did grow up with comming at my house. And he even started telling me that my female best friend is a b**ch and is manipulating me. Now he called my sister telling her that I was cheating on him with multiple people and I don’t know what to do anymore.
TL;DR : my boyfriend is saying that I am cheating with multiple friends and does not allow me to make any friends
23 comments
You break up with him. He’s a boyfriend of 6 months and is trying to destroy your close friendships and relationships. No one is worth that, especially at 6 months.
It sounds like he’s trying to isolate you. Run as fast as you can.
It is not healthy or appropriate for your boyfriend to dictate who you can and cannot be friends with. Having a support system of friends and family is important for everyone, and it is not fair for your boyfriend to try to control or limit your relationships with others. It is also concerning that he is making accusations of cheating without any evidence or justification.
It may be helpful to talk to your boyfriend about his behavior and express your concerns. You can let him know that you value your friendships and that it is important for you to be able to maintain these relationships. You can also remind him that trust and respect are essential components of a healthy relationship, and that his behavior is not conducive to building trust.
If your boyfriend continues to try to control your friendships or makes unfounded accusations, it may be necessary to seek support from a therapist or counselor. It is important to prioritize your own well-being and to set boundaries in relationships that are not healthy or respectful.
(via ChatGPT)
You break up with someone who tries to intervene in your friends like this.
drop this insecure loser.
– controlling personalities have only one antidote, get out
It’s good of him to let you know he’s abusive after only six months, I suppose. But you dump him, and you get your friends back, and you never have contact with him again.
Break up with him before he physically harms you or somebody else in your life.
Isolating their victims from friends and family is one of the first things abusers do. This man is bad news.
Drop him, he’s trying to isolate you so you only have him to rely on.
Why would you stay with someone who tells terrible lies about you to your own family? Soon he’ll be hitting you, cutting off your money, and further isolating you.
I know you have feelings for him. I know you want to go back to the early days when he was wonderful. I know how hard it is to break away from someone you care about.
But he’s not going to change, and he’s already ruining your life and your happiness. No guy is worth this.
Reach out to your friends and family and ask for help getting out of this relationship. Read the free PDF book “Why Does He Do That?” by Lundy Bancroft.
He’ll try to get you back by promising to change. Don’t do it. Block and avoid.
It’s perfectly normal and healthy to maintain friendships while you’re in a relationship.
If anything, a true test of your partners compatibility is their ability to fit in with your friends. Do they have things in common and can they get along with your friends without you there? E.g. if your partner bumped into some of your friends on the street without you there, would they be happy to see each other and strike up a conversation?
It’s always a huge warning sign when your partner makes zero effort to get to know your friends or even make friends with them. It can often be a key predictor of your future lifestyle. If he’s made zero effort to fit in and get to know your friends, that’s a huge sign that your future is going to be one where you’re having to forego fun nights out with your friends just to hang out with your partner 100% of the time. That’s a lonely existence for most people.
As everyone has said – it is not normal for a partner to ask that you completely sever your friendships. It’s a sign that they may want to control you and prevent you from having somewhere safe to go in the event you’re unhappy or they hurt you.
My golden rule has always been that my closest friends need to like my partner. In the infatuation phase (6-10 months) you’re often blind to their flaws so your friends are a good way to double check if your partner is actually playing you or they are a good fit.
Please, listen to me. You are in very real danger. End this relationship and cut all ties with this person. He’s definitely intentionally trying to isolate you and the abuse will escalate from there. Ask your friends and family for help. I wouldn’t stay alone for the first few weeks at least. He’s likely to try to keep contact and potentially could stalk you if you try to get away from him. Good luck. I’m sending you positive vibes. Be strong. You deserve so much better than this.
Is this a Commie parade? Because of all the red flags.
Is this all there is to the story? Because usually partners don’t just say cut someone off for no reason. Does A flirt with you? Does your bf Have friends that are girls ?
Your bf is abusive and he needs to go.
I know you don’t want to hear this, but leave him. NOW. The first thing an abuser will do is isolate you from friends and family, then there will be noone to stop him from harming and manipulating you.
Your boyfriend is mostly wrong it’s not wrong to have 2 friends its only wrong if you choose to hang around toxic friends who take advantage of you or hold you bank and if you spend more time with them than your boyfriend.
When anyone chooses to be in a relationship or eventyally marriage, your partner becomes 1st. Your friends, family, and parents are 2nd priority.
Why is he still your boyfriend? Why are you purposefully ignoring the red flags?
He’s no good for you.
time to dump your controlling and toxic boyfriend.
Have you read your own post? And you don’t know what to do?? Run little girl, run.
Classic narcissist move! He’s trying to isolate you, next it’ll be cutting your family off. Narcissists self reflect means he is the one who is a cheat.
Classic signs are accusing you of things you have not done, lying to others to make you look bad, they play victim, isolate you, will never admit their wrong, act like their perfect, gaslight you, love bomb you if you threaten to leave he’ll pull you back in by love bombing you. You need to get away from him my partner’s ex is a narcissist and him and their son both have PTSD and both in and out of therapy and have depression even after 6 years of no contract. He will distroy you, possibly rush you to get pregnant to trap you. You have to block him and ignore him. Please do your research narcissists do not love! They don’t know how to because they truly only believe themselves as the best everyone else is below them, they are selfish and cruel. This will end badly my partner lost all his friend’s and wasn’t aloud to speak to his family for 7 years she would beat him then tell everyone he beat her (he didn’t), she would accuse him of cheating when she was the one cheating, he was scared of her and too scared to leave as she’d use their child to manipulate him to stay. In those 7 years he lost his sister to cancer and then lost his mum he didn’t even know his sister was sick nor did he know his mum was, he wasn’taloud social media turned out someone got into contact with her to try tell him and she didn’t relay the message! She knew they were sick and didn’t tell him! His mum was his best friend and she distroyed their relationship. Made him believe his family and friends were bad and didn’t love him. They work slowly and chip away at your confidence, make you second guess yourself.
You got to be strong and leave.
Please listen to all of us and leave him.
Edit just read you other post from 15 days ago about how he stopped you from listening to your music and your mum! Other people have warned you, we have all warned you and you still continue to ignore. He will distroy you, you have got to go zero contact, his perfect boyfriend act at the beginning is called love bombing. He will do this when you threaten to leave. Break up with him then block him, he will try manipulate your sister to get her to tell you to go back, please don’t.
He’s trying to isolate you away from everyone who really cares about your wellbeing. He knows by doing so that you will have no one to turn to when he starts becoming abusive towards you. I had this happen to me. This is a HUGE red flag you do not want to ignore. Break up with him and block him everywhere you can. Let your family know what is going on so he doesn’t try to weasel his way back into your life. Reach out to the friends you cut off and explain what is going on. It is not worth convincing yourself you can fix it for him. Best of luck to you!